acrophobicpixie

294 pts ยท June 5, 2013


As my mom always said: "When you buy a new pair of heels, play soccer in them to break them in."

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

That guy needs to get a plate hanger & pop it on the wall. That's a talking point, for sure.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I'd do what she did. Even if they were taxed, that's like making $25 an hour at a job that you can't be fired from.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Trying to recreate the opening credits to "The Rifleman"?

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Imagine "Hair Guy" from Ancient Aliens saying all of this. Makes it at least 10x funnier.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Rory, is that you?

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

The one in charge was interviewed on Nightline and the Washington Post

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

A group of girls from the Bunny Ranch are campaigning against Trumpcare because it's shitty.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Good man. Good man.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

That's totally a Dedene...

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Don't forget to budget for the extended warranty package called "College". It's a doozy.

9 years ago | Likes 68 Dislikes 0

Also, they'll charge you for services that you don't request, like TV. And then try their damnedest to not reimburse you when you find out.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

change it over to your name, they instead close the account immediately, cutting off service. Happened to my mom and a family friend.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Shit quality, typically no competition, and heaven forbid your spouse die, because they only put accounts in one name, so when you go to 1/2

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Which Jessica? Dammit, @OP, you need to be more specific.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

My kid brother has autism, and subtitles help him focus on the dialogue.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Go to the reunion. Get dolled up (nice hair/outfit), and show everyone in that town who's a badass. Cause it's you. You're awesome, fuck 'em

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

No, go. Get your hair/makeup done, buy a pricey looking outfit, and show that town you mean business. Fuck them, you're awesome.

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 6

Same. Sweetest dog (German Shepherd/Golden Retriever mix). Had puppies by the asshole Doberman down the block. Doberman's owner's killed her

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Dammit, I knew that's where I went wrong. Should have made my male best friend sign a contract.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

14960! In the lead! Fingers, toes, arms, legs, and eyes crossed that you win, OP

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

That gives Satanists a bad name.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

to clean up since it's all stuck to the tape, and as long as the tape was straight, the bangs were straight.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I don't do bangs anymore, but when I did, I'd comb them, lay a strip of tape below where I wanted them to end, and cut off the tape. No mess

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

If it had been more spread out along the comb, and a longer section, this could have worked.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I'm so sorry for your loss. All the hugs for you and your fiance.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I kept getting that damned error message when I tried to reply. Sorry

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

It happened to me twice, with a big mac. I even got the manager to sing the damned jingle, since it's the first ingredient listed. 1/?

9 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 1