android1800

123369 pts · February 14, 2014


If this profile makes it to the front page, I'll promise to do some crazy shit, and then not do it. Because I lied.

The News: "We must practice Social Distancing in this time of crisis". My introvert ass:

Points 23
Comments 10
Views 1439

And don't even get me started with the "hole" in the top right corner of the screen trend either.

Points 1
Comments 12
Views 618

When you haven't had a piece of fruit or vegetable for what seems like forever so you eat a slice a watermelon

Points -5
Comments 0
Views 88

No Events, Gatherings, Gyms, Casinos, Bars, Theaters, Restaurants and stay in your homes for 15 days or even more.

Points 27
Comments 1
Views 998

Current events

Points 6
Comments 0
Views 231

Now I'm not saying mind reading technology already exists and is already in the hands of high-tech companies and governments but

Points 31
Comments 7
Views 1896

News: "We have to exercise mandatory social distancing to combat the virus. This will be very difficult." Introverts:

Points 11
Comments 0
Views 561

He a little confused, but he got the spirit

Points 7
Comments 0
Views 303

Because Coronavirus isn't doing a fast enough job, introducing...

Points 10
Comments 8
Views 481

Some fancy new store opened up near by. Went to check their website to see what they sell, but a pop up saying I have to sign up first is blocking my way

Points 4
Comments 0
Views 100

TFW you're told to just stay home and you're an introvert.

Points 1
Comments 2
Views 137

When you win an argument with facts

Points 0
Comments 3
Views 189

Title

Points -1
Comments 47
Views 285

MRW I see South Korea has drive-thru testing for COVID-19 for anyone who wants to take it while the U.S. doesn't

Points 24
Comments 8
Views 3334

MRW I hear about something called a "Skull Crusher Challenge" on TikTok and see videos of what it is on the news

Points 1
Comments 4
Views 242

"Wait? You mean acting stupidly and irresponsibly has consequences? Riot!" -NYC Orthodox Jewish Communities

Points 20
Comments 5
Views 555

TFW the Chinese kid in your class with a perfect attendance record since kindergarten calls out sick

Points -2
Comments 2
Views 153

A hero...

Points 2082
Comments 401
Views 770947

MRW I read what this Canadian PM "controversy" if all about and it's about fucking donuts. Fucking donuts...

Points 15
Comments 5
Views 685

Bring back rectangle phone screens with sharp corners.

Points -6
Comments 23
Views 280

Muh memes

Points 21
Comments 2
Views 203

Don't touch that

Points 4
Comments 2
Views 250

MRW (as a New Yorker) I hear Florida is setting COVID-19 records everyday and doing the worst than any other state.

Points 15
Comments 5
Views 559

This is the way

Points 15
Comments 17
Views 677

Dafuq?

Points 11
Comments 55
Views 685

I just found this out...

Points 21
Comments 2
Views 972

Wait... you're actually serious?

Points 5
Comments 40
Views 1126

Every fucking article be like

Points 2
Comments 3
Views 307

Remember when we all thought we'd be driving flying cars by now?

Points -5
Comments 3
Views 357

MRW I wake up and all of a sudden we hate LeBron James now?

Points -5
Comments 10
Views 214

He's gorgeous.

Points 10
Comments 21
Views 743

I'm slightly offended but I'll survive.

Points 20
Comments 3
Views 1007

When quarantine fatigue starts to set in 

Points -1
Comments 1
Views 65

Unpopular Opinion (Phone Screens)

Points 3
Comments 15
Views 533

*whistles*

Points 3572
Comments 114
Views 141583

I had no idea I was such a bigot

Points -1
Comments 43
Views 314

Come to think of it, my tin foil supply 'is' pretty low...

Points -5
Comments 24
Views 196

Poor Climate Change Girl

Points 16
Comments 0
Views 564

I'm sorry Tigger

Points -5
Comments 3
Views 205

Much different. So unique. Very original. Wow. 

Points -2
Comments 4
Views 222

Is nothing sacred?

Points -6
Comments 19
Views 265

Me watching married and living together couples during this quarantine slowly discovering they actually can't stand each other

Points 0
Comments 7
Views 3384

shame.gif

Points 2629
Comments 216
Views 105923

OMG

Points 35
Comments 4
Views 1096

When you violate Social Distancing

Points 10
Comments 7
Views 411

2019

Points 0
Comments 9
Views 240

Your butthole when you've had one too many burritos

Points 7
Comments 3
Views 504

I'm doing my part.

Points 21
Comments 4
Views 658

Nope

Points 7
Comments 2
Views 68

Government: "Social distancing, stay in home, 15 days at least." Spring Breakers:

Points 1
Comments 5
Views 193

I'm may be "a little" cranky until I've had it.

Points 2
Comments 0
Views 220

World: "China's totalitarianism is a threat to democracy and freedom as a whole" China: *curbs virus w/ totalitarianism* World:

Points -1
Comments 4
Views 920

When your indoor cat thinks he's an outdoor cat & decides to leave the house only to realize he can't last 3 minutes in the wild

Points 40
Comments 0
Views 2344

Not every little thing needs slo-mo

Points -3
Comments 4
Views 346

Go home.

Points 27
Comments 6
Views 811

Rolls On Wheels?

Points -1
Comments 13
Views 464

No thanks.

Points 20
Comments 8
Views 788

When you find a pistachio shell without a single crease to be found, completely intact and uncracked.

Points 30
Comments 5
Views 1457

That poker face

Points 14
Comments 6
Views 6696

I don't get it.

Points 1
Comments 7
Views 452
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