bittplayer

724 pts ยท September 27, 2012


So what you want is a monopoly?

4 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Maybe not, but if you try, you will hug many cats.

4 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 0

Oh and they didn't tell me it was a seasonal job until I got a letter in my last paycheck telling me it was my last paycheck.

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Two pre-orders, and the head of Electronics bought one the night before, when they came off the truck.

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Toys R Us, closing shift on XBox 360 launch day. Distro center shipped us four.

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I keep referring to him as "The Musk" and hoping it'll catch on.

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Alien (holding up a wireless mouse): This neural interface is, how do you say, bulky...

5 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Maybe the other fathers were depressed because Jesse was there?

5 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

I was like 29 when I learned that wasn't the case.

5 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

When I was a kid I assumed every country had their own Pledge of Allegiance, like how they all have national anthems.

5 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

They call themselves the PT Crewser.

5 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Do not try this at home, the hospitals have no room for you now.

5 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Fiddlesticks, I have made a hilarious grammatical error. That should say "CD Projekt Red's top dogs *don't* care..."

5 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Exactly. CD Projekt Red's top dogs doesn't care what we say, they care whether we buy the game. And I will not.

5 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

After proudly announcing they wouldn't, too.

5 years ago | Likes 90 Dislikes 10

I know people who boast that we have the best health care system in the world but have nothing but contempt for the people who use it.

6 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

#1 I... I thought it was a mirror...

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

"Valued partner" is what they call you because "disposable number in a spreadsheet" gets bad press.

6 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

My dad thinks we have the best health care system in the world, but sneers at the "weakness" of anyone who uses it. America!

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

HALO drop. For both questions.

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

You make that analogy, but I know people who blow past stop signs saying "other people's cars have brakes."

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Gonna go get a jar of assort gumble.

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Better reflexes than me...

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

It's literally an absurd statement designed to provoke people who don't know any better. It is a joke and you are the punch line.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Dude, it's a joke.

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

If you're not in a state that borders New York and you tell people that's where you're from, they assume you mean NYC.

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

People from New York and New Jersey think everyone from the other state are terrible drivers.

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Because we got stuff to do here first.

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0