blerft

1548 pts ยท February 4, 2020


This is a joke, right?

...Right??

21 hours ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Prepared by an FBI chef: "First, fuck the dead raccoon. Then plate it and serve to the HHS Secretary."

21 hours ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Yes, but he didn't mention it'll be donations of cyanide pills labelled as vitamins, and anthrax-laced blankets.

21 hours ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Why does she doubt her friend about the premium air? Does she think premium air is a waste of oxygen?

/cunk

21 hours ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 1

Google-fu says it's something to do with one of Brandon Sanderson's book series

1 day ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 1

Remember folks!
A pallet of goods,
A palette of colours,
A palate of flavours!

1 day ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Yeah, it feels way too much like an excuse in advance, and I'd bet they're only doing it because the person in question has other attributes (e.g. they're a fucking nazi). I have zero confidence that they'd be this considerate to anyone who doesn't wear a red hat.

1 day ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Twenty years ago, if someone told me this would happen, I would've laughed in their face. Today, all I can think is "How completely FUCKED is the FBI that they're willing to recruit people with this shit in their record, just to replace the staff who didn't bow down to the Orange KiddyRaping Shitstain?"

1 day ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

"Welcome our newest Special Agent, Mr Hands"

2 days ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Upvoted for styropyro reference

6 days ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Keith Richards' making pills full of jive,
Willie Nelson's singing fine...

1 week ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

There was a comic showing what happened with them in between Firefly and Serenity, and *very* briefly introduced (with just a shot of his hand) Chiwetel Ejiofor's 'The Operative' character to replace them. Considering Whedon's structure with the Buffy and Angel shows, I'd guess these guys would have been the season 1 villains, the Operative the season 2 villain, and so on.

1 week ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

An american political scientist. I don't really pay him any attention because he's the kind of fuckwit who blames NATO for Putin invading Ukraine. I don't know why he thinks that; maybe he just loves gargling Putin's nutsack.

1 week ago | Likes 15 Dislikes 3

There was a young fellow named Perkin,
Who was always jerkin his gherkin.
His wife said, "Hey Perkin!
Stop jerkin that gherkin!
That gherkin's for ferkin, not jerkin".

2 weeks ago | Likes 16 Dislikes 1

The same 'ally' that had one of its assets run a pedo ring for decades to gather blackmail material on the rich and powerful, including the incontinent orange clown in the Oval Office? That ally?

2 weeks ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

What the hell Stephen Merchant, get out of the stables, you're not a horse

2 weeks ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

The only unbelievable part of this headline is "Trump is QUIETLY WORKING". If it weren't for the Epstein files, I wouldn't believe he could be quiet about anything.

2 weeks ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Is he called the 'Barquis de Sade'?

2 weeks ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Buy some cheap fake gems from Temu
Sand down the stump top to remove any discolouration
Carve out holes in the top, insert gems and epoxy in place
Once dried add epoxy to the entire top, sand and polish
Voila, MAGIC STUMP, priced at $$$$$$$$

3 weeks ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

EVERYONE loves LOG!

3 weeks ago | Likes 67 Dislikes 0

You can pout, you can whine
Wanting to run all outside
Ooh, hear that howl, Husky scream
You are the drama queen

3 weeks ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Yeah, I just find it hilariously ironic since the Republicans kept accusing Obama of being the antichrist without any actual scripture to back it up. Yet Trump gets in and they ignore all the matches. And I've had a republican tell me that although he thinks Trump is a terrible person, God can use him to do good things. (That was the point at which I stopped discussing this shit with right-wingers 'cos they'll always find an excuse).

3 weeks ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Or - hear me out - honey badgers on meth.

1 month ago | Likes 16 Dislikes 0

#4 George GracefulBacon

1 month ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Apparently in like 1930's Britain there was a case of a trans man existing peacefully for years, until he inherited some property and a distant male relative challenged him in court to try and seize the inheritance. Long story short; Brit society FREAKED the fuck out and started cracking down on the whole idea of trans people. The possible threat of women potentially 'stealing' inheritances from their male relatives by 'pretending' to be trans was a major ontological shock for them.

1 month ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 0

This really is the dumbest fucking timeline.

1 month ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Popularised in the song 'Total Eclipse of the Shart'

1 month ago | Likes 21 Dislikes 0

"I meet so many assholes in my job."
"Well, try not to judge them; they're people too."

1 month ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

Curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal!

1 month ago | Likes 30 Dislikes 1