rmutt89

2565 pts ยท January 21, 2013


*grandpa

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I had to lifeguard during collegiate swim team practice. The hardest part was not falling asleep in my chair.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

broke the world record by almost a full body length. guys.

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

something something black vote

10 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 2

COME AT ME BRO

10 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Masturbating. You forgot masturbating.

10 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Hey @billyjackjay any idea where I could get a poster of that picture?

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

......

11 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

My first Christmas after college - "Socks. All the socks."

11 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 1

sigh... always proofread.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

That really should be a semicolon: "I din't choose the grammatically correct life; the grammatically correct life chose me."

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

it's ELECTABUZZ, you uncultured swine.

11 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

It exists. https://youtu.be/7WahBH9sANg you're welcome.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I don't know where she's going either, but I wanna go too.

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Bless you.

11 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Bless you.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

This. This is the definition of scaroused.

11 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Who are you kidding, let?

12 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

FACE SWAP NOW

12 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 1

if i spraypaint a supersoaker gold can i be steampunk too?

12 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

kids in italy eat french fries and sliced hot dogs on their pizza. it's called pizza americana.

12 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

well with a name like john jacob jinkleheimer schmidt, you had to have seen it coming.

13 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

border collies are definitely the jedi of the canine world.

13 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

that is the most accurate thing i've ever read.

13 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

you let that cat be beer RIGHT NOW

13 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

as a straight man, if i were a lesbian, ellen would give me a raging lady boner.

13 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

dammit. now i want a tiny velociraptor roaming around my apartment. might help with my fruit fly problem...

13 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

pfft. asians don't have body hair...

13 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0