ThisIsMyShit
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15060
417
Nov 7, 2013 12:52 AM
ThisIsMyShit
299925
15060
417
bluesun68
Thanks for reminding me I have no best friends, girl friends, and my family sucks.
dynamofox
The replying post is just as bad.
Johnzuay
This was actually kind of depressing because I realize I don't have a boyfriend or even a best friend. :/
Isuckatbeingagirl
Right? I was having a good day too.
NaturalBob
Being aggressive & calling someone selfish for considering suicide is NOT the way to go about it, they just need reminding they'll be missed
Ryden7
They believe that they don't belong in this world. The reason they even think about this decision is because they don't have what (1)
Ryden7
The post implies. Sure it could, but the way things are turning out in their life THEY don't believe that.
PANCAK3
This needs to go to the front page, i don't care if its a repost, people should read this.
ThisIsMyShit
If it is a repost, I honestly did not know. It popped up on my feed and I felt it needed to be shared.
PANCAK3
I dont know if it is either, but i dont care if someone says it is one.
ZorkZork69
Yeah, let's make them feel guilty to think of committing suicide on top of all the other reasons they want to do it. Sounds like a plan.
JohnnyTheBlade
So, the reason not to kill yourself is guilt? Yeah, not making me any less suicidal.
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JohnnyTheBlade
You would lose nothing, because you would be dead. You would not care what "the world" loses, because you would be dead. Still a bad reason.
SerialKitten666
Unless you have trouble sleeping, in which case, *hugs*
SerialKitten666
I find keeping pets really helps and having any kind of creative hobby that can serve as an outlet. Also sleeping instead when you're upset.
JohnnyTheBlade
Well, I have a snake, I play bass, beginning archery soon, and I have a lot of trouble sleeping.
necessity
Suicidal people don't think they're being selfish. If you attempt to shame them instead of help them you're only making them retract inwards
SomethingSomethingSomethingDarkSideSomethingSomethingComplete
Some people do not have any of those people in their lives, that are that close and care that much.
supercurl
It's been four years this December. Not a day goes by that I don't miss him.
lambaline
I'm so sorry for your loss.
flight815down
Three years this May. Neither of them ever got to see their 16th birthdays and neither of them will walk the stage at graduation with me.
NWSchoolboy
I'm sorry, but having attempted suicide, all the "selfishness" comments only induced guilt. What the fuck makes guilt anti-suicide?
Affray
If you are at the point of suicide, the harsh words of others couldn't make your situation any worse. Either they help you or they don't.
jpparkenbone
You don't know what you're talking about.
Affray
I have known a few people that needed a harsh reality check to put their shit in perspective. I know more than you may think.
jpparkenbone
Well I MYSELF am currently suffering from depression, so I say again, you do not know what you are talking about.
Affray
Fair enough. In your experience do kind words make much a a difference in your mental state either.Because in mine they didn't. *not sarcasm
IronsideSam
these would be the same " I matter more " people >.> they don't grasp depression and that guilting someone only hurts the situation.
IronsideSam
so that people wouldn't care as much. Leave shitty notes so that their family would hurt less. Shit like this is Selfish as much as suicide
IronsideSam
they also don't grasp that it just makes them feel worse about themselves ' how could i be so selfish? i'm a monster.. i should just leave"
IronsideSam
I've drug a lot of friends home to stay with me a few weeks due to this kind of shit cause they were thinking of running away and dying
notprtty
How about not waiting until the person to kills themselves to want to show them you care? Since most of those people probably told the (1)
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notprtty
Oh, no. I don't think people remain silent at all. They just "help" in the most selfish of ways.
[deleted]
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notprtty
Exactly. And don't try to explain it, you just get told you're wrong and apparently don't understand your own disease.
[deleted]
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AmeliePoulain
This is the only post I agree with 100%.
notprtty
depressed person they were too much to handle. Just cheer up. OMG, are you STILL crying about that? Etc... Sorry we wanted someone to (2)
notprtty
care while we were still alive. And not just talk about how selfish we were to not want to hurt anymore, because we couldn't handle the (3)
notprtty
constant, daily pain AND being alone and having no one to help soothe it anymore. Because we felt worthless when we COULDN'T just smile (4)
Ispelgood
But imagine getting help, but help that makes you feel worse in the sense that nobody can help ease the pain...
notprtty
like you kept telling us to. And we felt even worse when that meant you stopped coming around because we were such a burden. How about (5)
notprtty
fuck YOU and YOUR selfishness? We just want the pain to stop, and all you can do is make it about how YOU feel. Aces, friend. (6/6)
Thesinlesssinner
As someone who has lived through two suicide attempts, and years of depression, thank you for writing this. It's not selfish to-
Thesinlesssinner
want to unburden others in your life. When you feel like the have stopped caring about your illness and see you as a nuisance.
notprtty
Exactly. When every time you go to them for even the smallest bit of comfort and you can see them shut down, roll their eyes, or try (1)
notprtty
to run away, how else are you supposed to interpret that? Especially in a less-than-rational state? (2/2)
SerialKitten666
As someone with depression who just has a negative outlook but doesn't even burden people with personal problems/emotional outbursts 2/2
SerialKitten666
The majority of people all claim to care and then proceed to abandon you because the fact that your life sucks upsets them too much >.>2/2
doctorhat
Sometimes it's impossible to know. My friend's nickname was Smiles. Always seemed to be happy, always had a grin on his face. I saw him (1)
doctorhat
Three days before he killed himself, and had no indication he was suffering. All that we were left with afterwards was the confusion of (2)
doctorhat
Figuring out what went wrong, what we could have done. I'm convinced it's nothing. He made the selfish choice to leave, and let us deal (3)
doctorhat
with the consequences. You want support? Ask for it. People all around you love you and are happy to lend a shoulder or a hand. But (3)
doctorhat
don't tell me suicide isn't the most selfish act you can possibly take. The look on his friends and family's faces tells me otherwise.
Rhadjaz
Instead of shaming the person with depression and telling them "think about everybody else" we should think about the individual first.
paisleyschmaisley
...but the people who lose loved ones to suicide are usually depressed too...
testecull
The problem with this line of thought is that they've stopped caring about themselves completely. You need to find something else to help.
jpparkenbone
As a person with depression, go fuck yourself.
testecull
...and giving me an attitude like that will just make me shrug and go do something else.
Rhadjaz
In my opinion you should work with the positives instead of guilt tripping them with what could happen. Guilt will not cure depression.
aveykin
agreed, if anything it could make it worse.
testecull
In my opinion you use whatever leverage you can get to get the figurative(Or literal in some cases) gun off of their forehead.
testecull
Keep them from suicide now. Work on the depression later.
JosefTheFritzl
"Don't you dare kill yourself. You'll make US all feel terrible!" is not, I think, a very convincing or meaningful point to make.
ehejdjdijfjeje
This brought tears to my eyes.
GOOREGON
that is an extremely selfish way for someone to look at a friend killing themselves.
SerialKitten666
Agreed. Honestly, friends/family usually make depression all about them. "How could you do this to us" or "Stop being negative and ruining
SerialKitten666
my day, can't you just cheer up". etc, etc.
SerialKisser
I completely agree. Everyone always says the suicidal person is selfish, but if a person is in that much pain t's selfish to keep them alive
LegotheLee
Exactly. I tried explaining that to people yet I'm still the one in the wrong
SerialKisser
put it to sleep because YOU will hurt. You're not considering the pain of what you're keeping alive.
SerialKisser
Very few people have an open mind about this taboo subject. It's like putting a dog to sleep. The dog is in pain but you dont want to put
Cravenmobile
"Things they say just float through the air where you should be walking" - Oh my god
orphanannie
This is the line that got me. I could just picture the look on my family members faces. It's not an image I'll easily forget.
dreamfall
mysteriouspheonix
I thought the same way until I had to listen to the voicemails left by the people trying to find my while I was dying. Never again
lulatheoriginalcat
THANK YOU
BeardyDorf
Its such a hard line to walk really. I personally have to say that if I didn't fear making my mother sad as hell, I'd probably be dead now.
dreamfall
Same :(
LonLonRanchDressing
it's true that wanting someone alive for your own happiness is selfish. but other than your immediate family, you are the reason for (1)
LonLonRanchDressing
everyone else in your life. your spouse, kids, friends etc. you chose to share your love with them, and now you're ripping it away (2)
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thisisprocrastination
Many comments here are definitely about selfishness. I know because they say so, and use that word.
[deleted]
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thisisprocrastination
Aye.
KolgrimLang
This does not work. Please do not ask suicidals who can't be happy for themselves to be responsible for your happiness. Makes things harder.
randomsnarfle
I don't think this is targeted at suicidal people, but at the sort of people who made the graphic above encouraging people towards suicide.
ChainmailChick
They're not responsible for your happiness, but they are responsible for the pain they cause by killing themselves. It's not about (1)
ChainmailChick
putting on a brave face & pretending, it's about being strong enough for others to hang in there & seek help before you end it all (2)
SerialKitten666
But you become suicidal because you're not strong anymore. If you were strong, you wouldn't be suicidal, FFS.
maxineheadroom
oh FUCK YOU. You judge someone's strength on which symptoms their disease presents with?
ChainmailChick
Just because it's become almost impossible to be strong anymore doesn't mean you don't have strength left.
frisson
Spoiling someone else's happiness is not the same as scarring someone for life and making them more likely to commit suicide themselves.
IronsideSam
this is in fact actually a very bad thing to do. The goal becomes instead to distance yourself so when you do the deed no one cares or knows
balkingtowinnie
The thing I hate is that the post assumes the person has friends and a social life. If someone is suicidal it could be safe to say they dont
ballabutta
Yeah I agree this is kinda messed up I'm disappointed by how much attention this is getting.
starkart
It's depressing me
villhelm
how about the way i don't have any friends and my family hasn't spoken to me in 23 and a half years
gifraffe
Ill be your friend
reallyreallyrelevant
message me when you need someone to talk to.I'll even give you my phone number if you'd like someone to text back and forth during the day.
huggies18
i'd like to offer up the same service as reallyreallyrelevant, if you ever need help or someone to listen msg me, you deserve to be happy
WipeYourFeetReallyGoodOnTheRhythmRug
I was thinking the same. The person described sounds pretty fortunate to me. They have a lot more to lose than some. (1/2)
WipeYourFeetReallyGoodOnTheRhythmRug
(2/2) seriously though, why not take @reallyreallyrelevant up on their offer? Sometimes its easier to confide in people you don't know.
IAmTheSquidward
You have us. We are ALL your friend.
SwoundOfMusic
Easier said than done. Not calling you out, just saying. It isnt always about communication. The fight's deep within, for some.
IAmTheSquidward
Definitely. I suffered from acute depression while finding a correct treatment for GAD. It's rough. Just trying to find simple words..
Zedra234
I can be your friend.
balkingtowinnie
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B-5fxAqZlDQ
balkingtowinnie
I also don't have any friends. Honestly If I died only like 2 people would even know and that's because they live near me, and the thing 1/2
balkingtowinnie
The thing is, People will say "change your life" but I barely have money for food or rent. I literally couldn't go anywhere if i wanted.
THOReal
ill be your friend. please don't feel like you're alone.
balkingtowinnie
thank you, I don't know. I tried talking to people many times and I always get a weird look. I try to be friendly, but it never works.
THOReal
sucks for them because they're most likely missing out on someone who might be an awesome person.
AmeliePoulain
That's why I hate this post. If I had a best friend and a boyfriend and all these people, it WOULD be harder to kill myself.
jpparkenbone
Seriously. If I had friends and a girlfriend, it would be harder. But the fact is I don't, and I go through life every day alone, go to 1
jpparkenbone
bed alone, and just rinse and repeat day after miserable fucking day. Then pretentious douches like OP come in with their smell the roses 2
jpparkenbone
attitude and somehow convince themselves that they know from the outside how I feel. I don't mean to rationalize or romanticize suicide, 3
jpparkenbone
but a blanket statement of you are not alone to people who are very much alone doesn't help anything. 4
SerialKitten666
While I agree with this post, I also agree with you. Not everyone has something to lose, many people are far too alone. *hugs*
thisappisajoke
Count me in for listening. While I have my own problems, I can put them away for someone else.
THOReal
message me if you ever need someone to talk to. ill be your friend
ichoosenottorun
villhelm, I'd be your friend!
RunsWithShortShorts
One of my friends was killed about 11 mo. ago and every time I see his father, his eyes always look like they are in terrible, terrible pain
birdiebridget
*hug*
RunsWithShortShorts
Thank you.
janeclique
Seriously, fuck that mentality, suicide isn't beautiful.
Corki
I plan to do it. and i'm not saying simply for attention . it's not beautiful. it's just an end to the confusion that life is.
thedevil
It's not supposed to be, it's just supposed to be the end.
Reposting
Its beautiful to the person that wants to end it tho.
AdorableEvil
I knew a 14 year old who committed suicide by hanging about 9 months ago. Her parents asked for potted flowers instead of wreaths.
TaylorT
Most people don't do it because they think it's beautiful. They do it because they're in pain, scared, confused, upset, and lost.
Omega86yu
1.Not because they're in pain, scared and lost, people feel like that pretty often. But when you get TIRED of feeling that way, that's when
TaylorT
Truth
Omega86yu
2. dark thoughts become much more... inviting.
shadowlev
When I was suicidal, part of it was the thought that I was the cause of so many problems and my loved ones would be better off without me(1)
shadowlev
(5) I was in that dark dark place. I have a boyfriend, my family is better, and even when I feel my life is hopeless, I still have the
shadowlev
(3) I watched as all my loved ones broke down, held them up, felt them hold me up, and now I can't imagine putting them through that. My dad
shadowlev
(2) What pulled me back then was the thought of my grandma who loved me unconditionally and would suffer so much without me. After she died
shadowlev
(4) breaking down as I helped carry my grandmother to her final resting place is an image I'll never forget. It's gotten a lot better since
shadowlev
(6) viewpoint that if it gets that bad, then my family will be better off with me as a complete train wreck than dead.
Lyrabelle
<3
PikaCheck
Perhaps that was your grandmother's final gift to you: clarity and resolve. *hugs*
takingthehobbitstoisengard
Amen! Very glad you got through it all, hope it never comes back. :)
Disturbed2468
You just summed up how it felt like for me. Now I can't stop crying.
ArcticPunkFox
The best thing about character limit is that thanks to your story spanning many replies, I can upvote you many times. You deserve them
crazypassportgirl
oh jesus, you made me cry so fast! i'm so happy you came to these conclusions! +1
Misformanatee
"The woods are lovely, dark, and deep. But I've got promises to keep, and miles to go before I sleep. And miles to go before I sleep."
waspentalive
Was that poem about suicide? Never would have thought that...
Misformanatee
I've always seen it that way, but I think it's open to interpretation - which is what's great about most poetry! :)
voltekker
Promises to keep are what keeps me moving when I'm long out of spoons
xmsbeanx
Love this Robert Frost :)
nordeastyah
Somedays, that quote is all that keeps me going.
StarshipHufflepuff
same here, Robert Frost was amazing.
RunsWithShortShorts
Such a wonderful poem. My favorite.
ScottNapalm
Suicide will never be beautiful.
robnacho
unless its the ending to Independence Day (the movie)
ScottNapalm
Part of what bothers me is that we never seem to recognize what a loss a human life is. Even in the example of someone dying for a cause P1
IMadeAnAccountJustToWriteThis
I think it depends on how you define beautiful. Hitler's was morally gratifying. Thich Quang Duc's was iconic, touching, and influential.
IMadeAnAccountJustToWriteThis
Alan Turing died from cyanide poisoning, but there is some disagreement over whether it was suicide or a simple lab accident. If you...
IMadeAnAccountJustToWriteThis
...know his story, you can see why suicide is a much more poignant - beautiful, even, in a dark way - way for him to die. A lab accident...
IMadeAnAccountJustToWriteThis
...would have been a random, meaningless end to an otherwise extremely dramatic and meaningful life.
ScottNapalm
This is the problem. People assign some kind of tragic beauty to it, when ultimately it's still someone throwing everything away.
IMadeAnAccountJustToWriteThis
Not exactly. A suicide canbe more meaningful than a normal death. In Turing's case, it was a compelling argument to end persecution of gays.
SaintMaceToTheFace
he is just as dead. So it really doesn't matter
IMadeAnAccountJustToWriteThis
No, it does. The way people perceive how you died changes their opinion of you, which can change their world view in general.
ScottNapalm
We say they gave their lives as though they were giving up a seat on the bus. It's so casually addressed that we don't understand how P2
TaylorT
Most people don't do it because they think it's beautiful. They do it because they're in pain, scared, confused, upset, and lost.
annaZon
Thank you for saying this. I wish people wouldn't blame the person who is obviously in too much pain to fathom.
ScottNapalm
I'm painfully aware of that. It's exactly how I felt when I almost did it. Even so, there is still a significant portion that commit suicide
ScottNapalm
Because they only see the romanticized vision of it and fail to see the reality of the effect it will have.
[deleted]
[deleted]
ScottNapalm
(1) I agree with you on this because I know from experience that most people are simply looking for an end to the pain, but there is still
ScottNapalm
(2) a significant portion that are caught up in the romanticized version of it, whereas they may still be able to continue living otherwise.
AsheLake
Sorry to say this, but beauty is a personal opinion and not your call. Denying it doesn't make it go away. It's a problem that needs (1/2)
AsheLake
to be solved, not ignored. It's bigger than just a few silly kids. It is a social obsession, and recognizing that is the first step. (2/2)
ScottNapalm
P2 and as long as people are told that there can be some kind of beauty to be found in it, at least that facet of it will continue to exist.
AsheLake
I do agree that the romanticization of suicide is a problem, but your solution is overreaching and ineffective. The source is deeper.
ScottNapalm
My solution is to get people help and to dispell the romantic idealization we've surrounded it in.
ScottNapalm
P1 It should never be ignored. It needs to be cured. While beauty is a matter of opinion there are some things that simply are not beautiful
AsheLake
1:That is not for you or any mortal to assert. If I consider it beautiful then it is by definition beautiful, because it is beautiful to me.
ScottNapalm
P3 Some things just simply should never be considered beautiful by anyone.
ScottNapalm
P2 find a sane person who can honestly find something beautiful in something as dark as child soldiers or child abuse.
ScottNapalm
P1 It is possible that anything CAN be considered beautiful, but some things are not within the bounds of reason. I would challenge you to
AsheLake
2: The problem is not solved by denial.
ScottNapalm
I am not denying anything about the problem.
thedevil
it's not supposed to be, it's just supposed to be the end.
ScottNapalm
A brutal, horrifying end that tears apart the lives of anyone near you.
jpparkenbone
This is bullshit. Guilting someone never turned them away from suicide. It just makes them feel even worse about themselves.
thedevil
Perhaps, but still an end, which is ultimately what most suicidal people want.
AsheLake
For many people this is near irrelevant. After you're gone, so what? No consequences can ever affect a dead person.
ScottNapalm
And that is one of the most selfish ways anyone can think. I'm ashamed to say that I am very familiar with that thought process.
AsheLake
If someone is so alone in their suffering, how can you ask that they consider others? Calling it selfish makes it no less legitimate.
PurpleJesus
It's the same tumblr mentality where they all have a self-diagnosed mental disorder that they think makes them edgy, cool, and quirky
Veyrah
That alone sounds like a disorder. How can you disregard others feelings by doing that without feeling horrible.
IspellBananasbysingingGwenStefani
internet* mentality. Everyone tosses around the words social anxiety and depression but most of them don't have it. but most of them don't
reallyreallyrelevant
Though this is true, there is are varying degrees of these disorders.
IspellBananasbysingingGwenStefani
I agree. I just wish people wouldn't downplay the seriousness of these disorders for free internet points or a need for a pity party.
IspellBananasbysingingGwenStefani
what it's like to break down in public as a grown ass man and cry for the most illogical reasons.
AsheLake
This could be true, but you can never know who's legit or not over the internet, so I wouldn't be too hasty to judge here.
IspellBananasbysingingGwenStefani
Oh i'm not. Just a generalization.
ScottNapalm
awful that act is. P3
PnuttTheMighty
People need to stop romanticizing depression. It's not beautiful, it's something that needs to be cured and helped with.
DukePaulAtreides
Fuckin' A, mate.
rokkoralph
Chronic depression is a disease that should be treated. Occassional depression is normal. Tolerance is important too.
ChelsyWelsy
There are people who romanticize Depression? I have Depression, there is nothing romantic about it!
Konata33
I agree. Its hard to know what to do sometimes unfortunately.
bloomingdalera
True, but convincing yourself its beautiful is an attempt to make friends with it and make it not hurt so bad. Its a coping mechanism.
AnOceanOfStars
Suicide is not necessarily tied to depression.
TattoosAreNeat
I suffered through depression for years. My mom is the kind of woman who tells you that unless you're severely bleeding you're fine-
TattoosAreNeat
She would always just tell me to suck it up and deal with it. I almost died so many times because of that. I wish I had-
TattoosAreNeat
somone to tell me this back then.
Disturbed2468
I highly despise parents like that. The lack of empathy is disgusting.
potatosmesh
my dad's been depressed for most of his life. when i was younger, he would blame me and my sister for his feelings of worthlessness. (1)
potatosmesh
it's all just really shit. he would be happy one day, then come home the next day and just rage at us for things our previous failures. (2)
potatosmesh
depression turns u into a dick. all that said, i love my dad haha. he's actually heaps better now. i'm rambling. i have skinny fingers.
clovebird
Once we did a project where we were looked at someone's baby picture and made up a life. Somene said i'd be artistic because skinny fingers.
potatosmesh
lol i wonder if that's a thing. are u artistic? i guess i'm kind of artistic.
meowzedong
There's so much romanticizing of it too, by those not depressed, by those who function regularly. I don't wish this on anyone...
Silvarus
As someone that did suffer from clinical depression, thank you.
crepeculture
My question is this: is anybody going to do anything about it? The answer is no.
TacticusThrowaway
Just to be clear; I was agreeing with you.
AuroraFox
THANK YOU. +1
MyMonicker
I highly disagree. Not all people feel like they need to be changed or cured just because they are depressed. I have been depressed for (1)
MyMonicker
the last 12 years of my life, and I am fine with who I am. I hate it when people tell me I need to be happy to be a complete person. (2)
Spotrockaddict
Same goes for people with drug problems and unhealthy lifestyles. They need help and don't realize how their actions effect others.
AFlyingPrius
Man I was gonna say something, but it would've sounded stupid.
ProcrastinateurParExcellence
1) Apparently, I was eight years old when I first started thinking about suicide (according to my parents and some psychologist).
ProcrastinateurParExcellence
6) The same goes for the level of self-loathing I was dealing with - it wasn't just, "OMG every like TOTALLY hates me!", it was more...
ProcrastinateurParExcellence
2) I don't really remember much from... well, most of my life, because I spent so much of it being so broken that it stopped my psyche...
ProcrastinateurParExcellence
9) ...My life become meaningful.
ProcrastinateurParExcellence
8) There was nothing beautiful about the pain I went through for all those years, and only by defeating my depression has...
ProcrastinateurParExcellence
7) ...Like I was about as valuable as some alcoholic bum's soggy turd behind a container in a filthy and half-forgotten alley way.
ProcrastinateurParExcellence
5) ...In the middle of the night in the dead of winter. There are no words that are powerful enough to describe how horrible it was.
ProcrastinateurParExcellence
3) ...From working properly, but what memories I do have are all sepia or black and white, and completely devoid of any warmth.
ProcrastinateurParExcellence
4) In fact, a BIG chunk of my life sort of felt like being stuck at a solitary bus stop with no lighting out in the middle of nowhere...
TacticusThrowaway
There's a difference between "Mom didn't buy me that Beiber CD I wanted" and "it physically hurts me to wake up in the morning".
IAmQueenKoopa
i have so much trouble balancing finding beauty through pain & thinking i need to stay depressed because it makes me *deep & mysterious*
clovebird
YUP! Exactly. This was my problem for ages. I started doing CBT - look up Mind Over Mood. Now I just focus on actively making myself deep.
IAmQueenKoopa
^and that's embarrassing to admit.
annaZon
I honestly have no idea why you would ever want to stay depressed. I hate every second of it.
TurangaNibbler
After 5y of depression, it becomes the new normal Its comforting to stay in the darkness Cozy to snuggle up to loneliness &suicidal thoughts
zinkyre
As someone who's bipolar there's this small high on the upswing where you feel like you've slain a dragon and the upper is a reward. 1/2
zinkyre
It can be very addicting when you know that upper is going to be good.
bubblehearth
REAL depression isn't beautiful. Somehow, the darkness and pain become romanticized over the years. Real depression is deadly.
ttchoubs
^every damn kid at my high school.
illmakeamemeoutofyou
I thought this was sarcastic until I read the comments.
WORKITMAKEITDOIT
http://img.chan4chan.com/img/2011-03-07/1299498845873.png
pretzelnugget
After my friend's first attempt, they sent him to Florida for a few weeks for rehab and therapy, kinda like that. It doesn't last forever...
starkart
THIS! Just do the first step!
Veyrah
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WbfE4fp2BVY
ICanBelieveSomeOfItIsButter
4chan is so romantic
mrgrtjn
Beautiful, it gave me feels. But the tldr part just made me rofl again. The amazing power of /b/...
enizkoro
yet I couldn't bring myself to do any work without compulsively re-writing the same sentence for HOURS upon Hours until I was in tears (3)
SuharuStormrage
Why is there a tiny lil fucking black hand pointing up at the bottom of the post...
enizkoro
just lying in bed and hiding in my room made me hate myself so much I wanted to kill myself. But I still. couldn't. leave. the. fucking. bed
enizkoro
(I should probably add that now, after a year of antidepressants, I happily - yet nervously - crawl off my bed and [try to] do what I love)
enizkoro
and a loss of passion for all of the things that you love and you care about. I cared about my future. Knew I was failing my classes and (2)
sh1nd0kun
never thought id find a 4chan image inspirational
IAmTheSpy
You have much to learn, young sh1n.
jpparkenbone
It's only inspirational if you have no idea what depression is actually like.
enizkoro
a lovely sentiment, and exceptionally idealistic. The part he overlooked is that depression leaves you with a crippling fear of failure (1)
enizkoro
I remember wanting to be invisible and just falling off the face of the earth, because every interaction was so emotionally draining and (4)
balkingtowinnie
What I hate about this is that the people that give this advice completely ignore the fact that all that fucking COSTS money, and 1/2
[deleted]
[deleted]
ArcticPunkFox
By not letting the money hinder you. Hitchhike, use carpooling, disappear, breathe, live. And to people who are depressed truly...
ArcticPunkFox
Strength to you all
balkingtowinnie
you need money to eat. you need money to rent a room. Its like, How can you do anything when you can barely afford minimal living?
ArcticPunkFox
of course one of the things I keep forgetting in this scenario is that I still get money as an unemployed, since I live in Europe...
hungryh1ppo
The person who posted this has never been depressed. When you're depressed you do give a shit about any of those things.
KrazeHonkey
Exactly, not everyone can afford 'adventure'.
WORKITMAKEITDOIT
I went through depression and I agree, he's really making it out like its a lot simpler to get over, but I also kind of feel like if (1/2)
WORKITMAKEITDOIT
you take the time to do things that you were afraid of before you have the chance to really change. I looked at it as, "I was afraid (2/3)
WORKITMAKEITDOIT
To go out, or to talk to people, or do things. But I wasn't afraid to imagine ending it all? How is THAT less scary than the other stuff?"
balkingtowinnie
sometimes you don't even have the energy or the resources. that post is fucking unrealistic. how the fuck can i go to Barcelona?
LurkingInStilettos
Sell a kidney.
balkingtowinnie
how Am i going to find a kidney to sell??? Where would I look for one!
takingthehobbitstoisengard
I don't think this is about shaming people with suicidal tendencies, but shaming people who make things that encourage them in others.
Femsoni
fuck yes.
takingthehobbitstoisengard
Romanticizing suicide either online or IRL is the worst thing you can do. You're taking others with you. Possibly literally.
CopperWench
While things are currently bleak, permanently ill and being harassed by an abusive individual, right now I'm living out of spite. Fuck her.
takingthehobbitstoisengard
Wishing you all the best, hope time brings healing and that person drops out of your life ASAP.
flapperfemmefatale
As an occasionally suicidal person... you have to realize that in our heart of hearts, we think you all would be better off (1/?)
flapperfemmefatale
without us around. It's like a painful breakup... sure, you'll be sad for a bit. But then a few years will pass and you'll (2/?)
flapperfemmefatale
get over it. And as someone else said... it comes across as making it sound like we should live JUST for you.
takingthehobbitstoisengard
1) I understand (or can imagine). Heartbreaking for all involved. But I don't think people should be poetic about suicide.
Justaturtle
We never get over it, actually.
takingthehobbitstoisengard
2) You never know who might read it and think, "Yeah, okay, that makes sense."
ThisIsMyShit
Exactly. That is why I posted this. The person is not shaming people who commit suicide, but those who make it seem like it isn't a big deal
GeneralOblivious
When you think about it, it really isn't.
belle91
also it's important to note that there's a difference b/w shaming someone and pointing them to a jarring, harsh truth. When someone (1)
belle91
suicidal reads this, they aren't supposed to feel shame; it should be a wake-up call. Hopefully it's jarring, it alerts you to a (2)
belle91
serious problem in your thinking. You're depression has skewed your perspective. I'd gladly shock someone with this to save a life.
frisson
... and the lives of his/her loved ones.
lori1119
A 10-year-old client of mine (years ago) was seeing me b/c his dad killed himself. The kid said to me: (1)
Momof2needsabreak
My cousin killed himself, left no note, and it still bothers our family and his then gf. We still wonder why. Its been almost 9 years.
thatdutchguy
Honest question, doesn't posting this here violate doctor-patient confidentiality?
harles2000
No, because there are no identifying characteristics. No names, socials, nothing. No breach here
thatdutchguy
Okay thanks, I was honestly just wondering. Didnt know that it was an offensive question..
boobibop
I get downvoted for my comment when I've been suicidal- thanks for all proving how ignorant the world is about it. I rest my fucking case.
zeradeth
Or maybe this isn't the place to take rants? What if this was a funny picture site? Gosh, wouldn't that be great?
emefdzej
You need to realise that internet communities as a collective are fickle and not good place for saying that.
emefdzej
There are support sites that will help and not turn on you for whatever reason.
balkingtowinnie
I feel like I am just too lazy to be suicidal but the pain and the thoughts are there. I don't think I could ever do it. But they are there
WhatAboutScarecrow
Please please talk to someone about this. It doesn't have to be suicidal depression to be serious, and it can change to it in time anyway.
balkingtowinnie
talk to someone like who? I wouldn't know where to begin :/ I couldn't afford to go to a therapist or something.
WhatAboutScarecrow
http://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/go/find_therapy has some info on this. Sorry i couldnt be of more help, i dont know much about (1/2)
LordVysh
"A client of ten years" is less ambiguous so that you don't have to specify that your client isn't 10 years of age. Just a friendly tip.
graywacke
Your life belongs to others!
balkingtowinnie
what if you don't have any friends. no wife. then who does it belong to?
aveykin
Yourself, honestly I hate this post, only because it promotes guilt in an already likely guilt ridden person. You have to live for you.
digisol
As a suicidal person that hates living, I feel that as another reason why I hate being alive - Not only do I hate being alive I.. 1/2
digisol
but I am stuck here because everyone else will feel pain when I leave. This existence sucks, go ahead - downvote me. It will prove my point
[deleted]
[deleted]
WhereTheWildGooseGoes
So sorry for your loss. :(
messyaurora
This breaks my heart. *hug*
ItsCaptain0bvious
:/
yoshimasta
Send you a honest and big hug. Sorry for your loss.
LordVysh
"A client of ten years" is less ambiguous so that you don't have to specify that the client is not 10 years of age. Just a friendly tip.
lori1119
He was 10 years old. I didn't see him for 10 years. I'm not sure I'm understanding your comment.
LordVysh
Well then, it was even more ambiguous. Then you could've used "Years ago a 10-year old client" or "A 10-year old client, this was years ago"
[deleted]
[deleted]
planeteer
I grew up with a mentally ill mother. She is still mentally ill. I love her and she loves me.
akroe
there's is always help for those who seek it and hell an ill dad is ALWAYS better than no dad!
balkingtowinnie
what kind of help? I haven't found any. my loneliness is still there
rainbowjo
Have you had both an ill dad and then no dad? Mental illness affects people in different ways. It can severely affect family and friends.
[deleted]
[deleted]
ZoidbergIsGreat
There is always a choice. Depression does cause thought processes to become skewed and illogical but there's time on the descent to get help
farmerJon990
I agree, depression can be debilitating and crippling. Feeling
ObscureStarWarsReference
Depression IS a mental illness. But suicide is always a choice. People may feel like it is the only choice left, but it's still a choice.
Barthy
Agreed. He wasn't given a choice - it was uncured illness. That makes suicide much more bearable for relatives.
IgnatiusJReilly2601
The truth is somewhere in between.
Majorgrunt
He had depression, he chose suicide.
loveisallwereallyhave
That is such horseshit.
loveisallwereallyhave
How are you downvoting this? "Terminal depression" my ass. As someone who has suffered from depression my entire life, I can assure you...
loveisallwereallyhave
...It is not terminal unless you let it be. Go outside. Exercise. Fight the Power. Suicide is a choice and a bitch choice at that.
balkingtowinnie
it is a choice. I choose to live even thought I have constant thoughts of suicide. I choose to go on even though I have no friends.
ObscureStarWarsReference
Keep fighting, you're worth it.
ObscureStarWarsReference
Just remember that depression may make you think you have no friends, but I bet there's a lot of people out there who think otherwise. <3
balkingtowinnie
yeah I know. I am too scared of feeling pain, so I can't ever take my life. but sometimes I feel like I am barely alive, barely here
ObscureStarWarsReference
talk to someone, take something, keep trying stuff until something works. It's worth it. Life IS beautiful.
ObscureStarWarsReference
I can only imagine, because I haven't been in your shoes. But know that's the depression affecting the way you think. See someone, (1)
boobibop
He had mentally withdrawn and become isolated, in his mind, he's already lost everything. It is an illness, not a voluntary though process.
eashiller
letting yourself get to the point where it is no longer a choice is in fact a choice, i've been there and stopped myself many times
SoapyMammaryMasturbation
You've not been there. You've been where you've been, but if you've not committed suicide, then you haven't been *there*.
boobibop
It's a mental illness that makes you believe you have no other choice. You don't choose to be mentally ill, you don't choose suicide.
eashiller
but you can choose to fight it. mental or not we stil have that power
digisol
or you can choose not too..
SoapyMammaryMasturbation
Power is what you don't have when you reach that point. You're exhausted, your fight is spent, and you feel like you're already dead.
haurris
I'm getting help because I don't want it to come to this. Now I feel like a dick. I need to apologize to everyone I love for worrying them.
scrodobaggins
Don't apologize! You're getting help and trying, believe me they appreciate it more than you will ever realize.
lori1119
You don't have to apologize for your feelings. But, talking about how you feel with those people might lead you to better things in life.
haurris
Thank you. Its hard to remember it's not about you when you get so stuck in your own thoughts. I can't wait for my first appointment! Thanku
messyaurora
You don't need to apologize, the fact that you are getting help is apologize enough. Just tell them you love them.
Ihave6cats
I'm suffering with this as well. It's so hard not to think selfishly in this mindset. I seriously wish you the best of luck!
IDontKnowWhatToMakeMyNameButImGoingToMakeItAsLongAsIFuckingCan
my buddy commit suicide almost 2 years ago now, the day it happened I bawled on the phone with my sister, apologizing for ever (1/2)
IDontKnowWhatToMakeMyNameButImGoingToMakeItAsLongAsIFuckingCan
even considering suicide, this was the first time I told her that. She started bawling too just from the thought, I felt like an such an ass
globexcorporation
My husband suffers from severe depression. I know he feels badly for what I've gone through but I love him so much I would rather put up (1)
globexcorporation
with it than be without him. We have 2 children and they need him. I hope he never gives up because this post is my greatest fear. (2)
globexcorporation
I hope you're able to get the help you need.
ItsAMaizeAndBlueThing
When I was 12, my mom came to room after downing a bunch of pills. She foamed at the mouth, convulsed, it was terrifying. Still haunts me
UsernameForwardSlashAccountURL
My dad committed suicide about 6 years ago. I think of him every day. I still have one of his pillows. It smells like him, but just barely.
ChangedMyName
I know it's hard to believe but it gets better. My aunt made be a blanket out of all of my dad's old shirts.
tranderas
I don't like this sort of guilting when I start to talk about my feelings. It makes me feel much, much worse.
Rhadjaz
Agreed. When you talk about your feelings it should be about you, not about somebody else.
flight815down
One of my friends did it exactly 4 weeks after another one's. I dreamed every night for 3 months that another one would happen in 4 weeks
flight815down
2) because then it could be some serial killer, or something ridiculous like that. At least then I would have someone to be angry at
SryTyler
Two people in my group of friends took their life in almost the exact time frame a month and a half ago. It really is a shame.
flight815down
Suicide's a disease. It infects everybody around it and some people just can't shake it off.
lori1119
"He chose to die than spend one more minute with me." I tell my current patients this when we talk about suicide. It puts things (2)
TacticusThrowaway
Don't suicidal people think of themselves as a burden to their loved ones? I know i did.
En3rgyTurtle
This is literally putting me in tears...
ChangedMyName
I think that kid was me.
DoubleSixes
?
SYSTEMERROR34
Go on.
ChangedMyName
Absolutely not. My dad committed suicide when I wad 8. I saw a therapist at school for awhile
lori1119
Maybe . . . I hope if it was the things we talked about helped you. He would be about 17 or 18 now, I think.
ChangedMyName
I'm 23 now. I used to live in Westminster, CA. Maybe it wasn't me but I had a similar mind set when it happened.
SeriouslyJoking
I hope this isnt a sick joke
arealpieceofwerk
SeriouslyJoking?
SeriouslyJoking
what about it? im just saying i hope someone wouldnt joke about this kind of thing
ChangedMyName
Absolutely not. My dad committed suicide when I wad 8. I saw a therapist at school for awhile
SeriouslyJoking
I am very sorry for your loss. That would be terrible. I've seem messed up stuff too. But not like that.. Msg me is you ever need to:)
cows8me
I hope you know this now, but it wasn't your fault.
WobbuffetAndElephants
My father killed himself when I was three years old. My uncle killed himself a year and a half ago, when I was 18 years old. It's hard.
avenlanzer
I was suicidal for a long time (finally medicated), only thing that held me together was knowing I could NEVER do that to my children.
NuggetsForKitty
I'm struggling with wanting to kill myself every day and the very last thread even slightly holding me together is my daughter.
illmakeamemeoutofyou
what did you say to counsel the kid?
lori1119
I told him he owed it to himself to try to make a good life for himself.
claudex
a good reminder to not have kid
ladybuglove
I see you were downvoted to hell for this but I totally agree!
groversleeves
That is so terrible it hurts.
hystericant
I literally said "holy shit," out loud when I read those comments
lori1119
into perspective when you are reminded that your life is important to other people. It can motivate you to find that next reason to get up.
zacharus
That is some of the strongest shit i ever heared, kids can explain things so easy...
WoolUndies
What did you tell the boy? Is that something you can share?
lori1119
I told him he owed it to himself to try to give himself the best life possible. He can choose life. He can choose to live.
legofl
My dad committed suicide and I think that all the time. Everyone always said he loved me so much...but not enough to stay with me. It hurts
lori1119
Live your life. Really. Past hurts don't go away, but you owe it to yourself to live everyday in search of good.
meteorecho
*sigh*.
legofl
Thanks everyone. It was 5 years ago and I understand he was not in a good mental state but it still kind of hits me every once in a while.
NeverMindtheManBehindtheCurtain
So here's a hug. I don't know you, but I love you, because we've both been through some tough shit. Hope this helps. 2/2
ChangedMyName
I know that feeling. Good luck with rest of your life and try to move past it
NeverMindtheManBehindtheCurtain
I am so sorry. My dad died when I was 13. It was the worst thing I've ever felt. And I know it's hard. Hope you can begin to heal. 1/2
ladylexington
My dad did too, and I can't help but feel the same way no matter what anyone says. (((Hugs)))
MrSnowy
Four years on, i hope the situation improved. Best of luck
horizontalcracker
I don't believe people who choose suicide are in a normal state of mind. Don't think he didn't love you because he left, please.
akroe
I absolutely agree, people who commit suicide do it because life has become to hard for them and it's the only way out for them
Reuta
Yeah mine did too, a couple years ago. We were just getting closer too. It sucks. I try not to think about it but I cant help it.
batmanbumantics
As someone with depression you should know that in his devastated mind he had rationalized you'd be better off without him.
everybodystalfos
This sounds like it came directly from my head. Nice to know we're not alone.
Monstermomma
As a 30 year old woman I'm easily crippled by the same feelings as the ones I felt the day we found him, twenty five years ago. It's hard.
Monstermomma
My dad I mean. If there is something time doesn't heal, losing a parent to suicide might be it.
ghostie808
Hugs*. He wasnt thinking from your perspective. :(
connorcat
Unfortunately that's very true. A lot of people don't commit suicide because they genuinely want to die; they do it because (1)
thisisprocrastination
And "we" aren't thinking from his.
XooMG
This reply won't be noticed but I considered suicide after the birth of my daughter. Felt she deserved a better life than I could offer (1)
XooMG
...and I felt that I could get out of my girlfriend's life and give her a chance to find something better.
anotherplacetoputstuff
Same here, but a terminal disease and the desire to not be a burden, this was his last gift. No one knew he was sick until he was gone
cerseilannisterscheekbones
My mom has battled crippling metastatic cancer for 5 yrs. Sometimes she says she wants to end it, and even tho I'm gutted, I understand.
Valewalker
All aboard the feels train!!!! God this was hard to read
birdiebridget
When my dad tried to kill himself, he wrote a goodbye note to his pastor and not his family. That's something I will never, ever get over.
sketchylear
Yeah but what do you tell him
lori1119
I told him that he still had a lot to live for and he owed it to himself to give himself a shot at a good life.
ahernandez
Therapy five!
SuperKawaiiChan
I'm sorry to hear this. But this is the reason why I'm still here, because I know my family would be sad if I did a selfish thing.
mamariah
I am 20 years old, 7 months into grieving, and even I feel this way though logically I know I should not.
lori1119
Logic and feelings often conflict. It's ok to feel sad, to feel lonely, to feel hurt. As time goes on, the grief will lessen.
poopgoesthedynamite
http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20130905032203/sonassandbox/images/2/2d/Time_for_a_feel_trip.jpg
MyUserNameIsAproposOfNothing
When I was contemplating suicide years ago, it took small things to make me delay. A new movie was coming, or a video game, or a trip, etc
TheOneAndOnlyBenedictCumberBITCH
My little sister tried last month. Hits right in the feels :(
TheOneAndOnlyBenedictCumberBITCH
My family kept it really private. It feels nice to finally tell someone else. Even if it means putting into the anonymity of the interwebs.
IKilledKennyAndIAmABastard
*Hugs* If you ever need anyone to talk to message me. I'm glad your sister is still here
ilivebetweendikes
Stay strong!
megsd
My best friend is getting married in 6 weeks and her mom killed herself last week. She just found out. This is exactly how she feels today
PoliteIrishGuy
Ive been sat here for an hour trying to think of a way to reply to this but nothing comes to mind when i think "I still want to die".
digisol
Constantly think about it here...
lori1119
Make a list of everything you want to do before you die. Make "die" the very last thing. The choice will get further away the more you live.
thealtmer
I think even in the most desperate of situations, you always have a reason to live. And I don't usually engage in conversation on here, but
hellafordays
Me too. It sucks.
YouveGotTwoEmptyHalvesOfACoconutAndYoureBanginEmTogether
I know you don't know me, but I don't want you to die. I'm sure we're a whole world apart but I care about you and everyone here.
Cyprium
Think about your mother and father and siblings and the hole you will tear in their souls that can never ever ever ben mended.
mangonadasaregreat
I attempted because, in my mind at the time, I would have been one less burden to my family. Sad part is that I KNOW that some wouldn't(1/2)
mangonadasaregreat
have even bat an eye. Now I say "Fuck you and your couch, I'm happy and that makes you mad."
Munchlax
that poor child. dealing with something like this must have devastated him.
Grimlockt
thank you
UsernameForwardSlashAccountURL
The same thoughts have gone through my head many times. Having someone you love doing something like that really does provide perspective.
Darmek
My problem is, none of those things are a reason for you to live, why live simply to make others happy, what kind of life is that...
lori1119
It's not the reason. It is the motivation to keep looking to find something.
Darmek
Just seems empty...
Darmek
I mean how does trying to make others happy when your miserable give your life purpose, does that make a person who commits suicide selfish?
lori1119
Not saying your life should be about making other people happy. It should not.
Darmek
Why should a person simply live their life to make people happy when they cant crawl out of the pit of depression they themselves are in.
maxineheadroom
Hearing that how others feel is more important than how I feel just made me feel even more worthless & ashamed when I was in therapy.
Agisek
yeah that would put people into perspective... except people who do think about suicide dont believe there is anyone who loves them
lori1119
Some people believe that. It never hurts to be reminded.
tomhiddlestonsthirdtesticlewhyyesyoucantouchmeallyouwant
My friend killed himself in June. His daughter just turned 5 in August.
YouShallCuddleTheMath
It can't be just that. I can't choose to live just because I'm morally obliged not to hurt my darlings. That's not enough.
lori1119
It's not just that. It's a start.
illmakeamemeoutofyou
I talk to my counselor about this all the time. I don't want to exist solely bc my absence would make my loved ones sad. I need to live 4 me
illmakeamemeoutofyou
But I wouldn't. I couldn't do that to my family. Any more than I could or would want to cuddle math.
YouShallCuddleTheMath
You know exactly how I feel, milady.
Olbenji
this sums it up perfectly. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c_ezxfiZ8vI&feature=c4-overview-vl&list=PL61B053A1045616D5
thegreatgatsB
As someone who is in a desperate situation and has an 8 year old daughter, THANK YOU! I needed to read this. I have changed my mind, I live.
Benegesseritwitch75
you keep going every day for that kid, be a great parent! I know my kids kept me here till I got happy again, and they are worth it!
lori1119
This made me happy. You are welcome :)
iamtheholyninja
i tried to kill myself one week ago.i did it because I knew that nowone actually cared but only my parents.and still nowone does.but im here
Cyprium
Our son tried on mother's day and succeeded on October 4th. We will never heal from it. His sisters and brothers will never heal from it.
lori1119
You must be here for a reason. Don't stop living until you figured out that reason.
iamtheholyninja
i suppose i m not the only that ultimately regrets it when he actually do it.hemorrhage was close, but didn't kill me
garlicandsaphires
If you can put things into perspective, you probably aren't mentally ill. If the brain is diseased you can't expect it to work right. (1)
lori1119
Not only mentally ill people kill themselves. I know that sounds strange, but some people just don't see a point to continue.
garlicandsaphires
Absolutely true. Hopefully this discussion will help some of them step back from the edge.
garlicandsaphires
If your brain isn't working correctly, it may perceive wrongly, evaluate wrongly, and decide wrongly. To expect otherwise is like (2)
garlicandsaphires
expecting a legless man to run. The disease may make suicide look like the only kind thing that can be done. The diseases are horrible (3).
Bombideer
Are you a therapist? Because I've been considering a lot about learning a few things about the field so I can help people more.
LocutusOfBored
Not an answer to your question, but it might help http://lifehacker.com/how-to-find-someone-to-talk-to-when-you-cant-afford-th-1185844420
thepigeonman
a big thing would be a crisis line. it gives you actual experience of what it's like to deal with people with these problems.
lori1119
Yes. I have my master's in social work. I worked in the community for 8 years and have been working with inmates for the past 6. Learn more!
Bombideer
(1)Got any advice for a good place to start? Without enrolling for a degree, that is. I want to help people with these things, and I've been
laboon
This is what keeps me going but its like walking through lava. it burns so bad. ill keep going as long as i can for them but i cant forever.
lori1119
Don't do it for them. Do it for you. Keep trying to find that one thing that will keep you going. It'll lead to more.