DarthYohanan
135108
2571
68
Ding Dong
Feb 21, 2018 11:03 PM
DarthYohanan
135108
2571
68
JustMelinda
LMAO! Who feels like shit after masturbating? Devil's doorbell, someone should tattoo that above their clit
WeenusMaGee
pee is stored in the balls. This is a scientific fact
objectreborn
I, uh... don't feel like garbage, afterward, though....
SpacePandaBryan7
Pee is stored in the balls
rhcpmuse911
Humans need that refactoring period of shame afterwards. Otherwise what else would we do.
GadenKerensky
The clitoris, biologically speaking, is the analogue to the penis, IIRC.
Bortus
Its weird that the only people who mutilate genitals are the religious and the insane.
retrohellix
somecleverassname
RinCookieSmuggler
Nattodesu
I'm not suggesting this isn't super dumb, but actually female orgasm increases lubrication and expands the cervix, helping pregnancy chances
Sociallyantisocal
Ding dong...ding dong.. dingdong.dingdongdingdongdingdingdingdong
sharkhugs
But boys masturbating is ok everybody! Only male pleasure matters!
shbaker927
Don't tell me not to finger paint when I'm feeling creative.
texasjones
"Do you know why you feel like garbage after you masturbate?"
illuminasty
duckshooter
You know what happened after that
NoIdidntsayAbeLincolnIsaidHeyBlinkin
Girls who masturbate. You're doing great, sweeties
alovelypintofguinness
Double click your mouse, ladies
TheCrusher78
It's funny how there are still people out there who are like this..Why would a bearded man in the sky care if you touch your self??
JabbaTheSwampBandit
If that's the case I sure love ding dong ditching
candiduscorvus
I almost think KenM should be writing that.
Derfboy
leroy666
Fundamentalists live in mortal fear that somewhere, somehow, some people are enjoying themselves.
UrsulatheArtist
Shrugs* I hear its also called the dinner bell.
pinkeye82
Likey!
HorsefaceBeeguy
The slotted salmon
WhistlePig
Ew...
ILoveDaftPunk
Must be why my boyfriend keeps putting his mouth on it
UrsulatheArtist
dinner is served everyday silly
JabbaTheSwampBandit
I like to ding dong ditch
TheGalacticLeprechaunwithtinynipples
Now I want a clit shaped doorbell. Brass, preferably - so that it shines where everybody has been pressing all the time
picklesandmayonnaisesandwich
If it's the devil's doorbell then it's Hallowe'en everyday in my world.
MerToo
Considering how roughly most Harleys run I am surprised you haven't brought about the Apocalypse.
BumblyWumbly
What kind of bike?
RealLifeDexter
https://media1.giphy.com/media/pjnfNhaFmkhxu/giphy.gif
DadJokesCollector
If it's the devil's doorbell he'd better be fast. Cause I done did a lot of ringin' and runnin'.
ohkayykayykayy
Ding dong pleasing.
NM156
He actually only answers when you pound on the G spot.
MrWeemsicle
Excuse me, babies come out the butt. The clit is a safe place...
DevonGronka
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sAVAR63ZtQE
iamthisguy247
Is that why everyone wants a safe space these days?
secondgoaround
My three are little shits, so yeah...
RealLifeDexter
https://media0.giphy.com/media/SqmkZ5IdwzTP2/giphy.gif
mikeatike
Of course, how else do gay couples give birth.
theslowestsloth
And just now one guy told me he doesn't need birth lessons as he is gay. Sigh.
Baughr
A friend just had a baby, that's the only way i ever referred to giving birth around her while she was pregnant lol
DromedarySphincter
So sayeth the C.L.I.T. Commander.
dirtymobileuser101
ADisturbinglyAttractiveCactus
Well I'll be a camel's ass!
DromedarySphincter
That is a disturbingly attractive cactus. So... succulent.
MrWeemsicle
I have always dreamed of being called the clit commander
RealLifeDexter
So did I.
NachoPete
@clitcommander?
RealLifeDexter
What is it now Pete?
RealLifeDexter
How did you get that from this?...
selkieselk
This is what happens when religion is allowed to interfere with education >.<
[deleted]
[deleted]
selkieselk
There's no such thing as too many times ;)
PaintedSlate
Politicized religion. What could go wrong?
jrellis462
What's religion got to do with it? They're just an idiot
alex5775
Just like with gay marriage, religion plays a part with its "traditional family values"
erischilde
Somebody taught them this. Idiocy doesn't exist in a vacuum.
jrellis462
So then it must be a religion? That's pretty bigoted
merlinious
"Devil's doorbell" and him answering are both pretty strong indicators this was religious influence.
thisgirlwantsnoname
Clearly you've never known anyone who makes assumptions...
MarshawnLynch
This is most likely a joke
yeldarb92
So fucking true, sex Ed should be mandatory. I'm looking at you Alabama/most southern states.
DamienAllbran
Accurate, Alabama only requires a Level 1 sex ed, meaning that the minimum needed to be taught in sex ed is abstinence
IDONTKNOWWHATWEREYELLINGABOUTLOUDNOISES
It's not even sex ed at a certain point... It's just biology.
PiGuy314
Tennessee here. We got sex ed. But it was mostly "here are all the reasons not to have sex." In middle school they had a group of 1/?
yeldarb92
Proper sex Ed like hey when you do decided to fuck your girlfriend wear a damn condom
PiGuy314
about 8 kids stand up front and chew up a peanut butter cracker and spit it into the same cup. They compared it to having multiple 2/3
PiGuy314
sexual partners. 3/3
Darla626
What. The. Fuck.
Inmate45
I mean, that is way too articulately written to be a true moron writing it. Feels like they're taking the piss.
Vaanhalen
Also. A prude isn't going to call a clit a "doorbell." That's like Pastor Mike saying "now girls, remember dont suck his lollipop"
mithiwithi
Poe's Law works both ways. Sincere nutjobs can fall for parody sites and repeat it in seriousness.
LivinginLuling
I get your point. Went to catholic schools where science & math & education were highly valued. 99% of my teachers were great. Then 1)
LivinginLuling
There’s the one who told us there’s never been an instance of pregnancy from rape so the argument of aborting bc of rape is invalid. 2)
LivinginLuling
Which I believed until I was 17. Bc why would she tells us a lie about something so important. 3)
Vaanhalen
It's such nonsense, it's almost like there has to be a nugget of truth buried somewhere that that nonsense is based on
zamielvanweber
Ironically evidence suggests female orgasms were part of procreation ages ago. It's like the only part that is remotely true.
FirstThingThatCameToMind
before we evolved the menstrual cycle, orgasms were what triggered ovulation. at least, thats the theory I read.
justchelsea
maybe the orgasm was the only way to motivate ladies to let that weird looking thing in there.
MacheteBettie
It's not a bad theory. Lots of other species are, um, better equipped for not-entirly-consensual reproduction. Might have served as a
sshawnsamuell
Nothing like a good ol' barbed dick
MacheteBettie
Motivation for pre-humans/humans. I'm sure glad it did!
zamielvanweber
The theory is that the orgasm induced ovulation, just like a male orgasm induce ejaculation. Eventually humans switched over to a cycle.
sherbetty
Is it possible the contractions of organ could help suck the sperm up?
Youareobscure
Some would go up, some would go down. But sperm can propel themselves so it doesn't matter. Orgasms give incentive for more sex= more babies
Lfa3
It seems to happen yes, I remember of a research talking about it
Assilem22
It's called "upsuck" in theory. But there has been research on it and it hasn't really shown that it helps.
merlinious
I thought they used a radioactive dye and a scanner to show that the orgasm really sucked it up, and sent it towards the fallopian tube
merlinious
Which would release an egg next
smtxom
BastardRaptor
Djmachale1
Idk if I will ever need this but I'm taking it Just for the off chance I do need it
meadmaker
rowm
TheGrammarFuzz
This ain’t rocket surgery.
StormSaxon
Who ordered the whoop ass fajitas?!
ScreamingGreenFrog
https://imgur.com/K4GuSTK
Baurge
https://youtu.be/BULVvXrACdk
NotSureIfSarcastic
Oh god. I laughed so hard I snorted
nrvagntsoleatr360
What is this from?
IWishMyNameWasDanDruff
did you get it?
TheLannistersSendALovelyFruitBasket
Boondock Saints 2
Cutter1
Boondock Saints II
Poundkey
Boondock Saints II all saints day
TheSkecchi
Second boondock saints