TanstaaflTovarisch
485889
10864
347
Apr 2, 2015 1:59 AM
TanstaaflTovarisch
485889
10864
347
mextexcomenntaco
From all the jokes tgis one is the one that resounded to me the most. Explains a bunch of shit this nation is over inflating
nascarguy
+1 for beard down to dick
TheIrishMisfit
+1 for giving sauce
baconandeggsequalbreakfast
Duck sauce.
BuckNaked78
Ohyou.gif
SomeGuyWithASword
-1 for not giving cheese sauce
ninmonkey
9/10 chef's agree
KaesekopfNW
Also applies to his recent bit - the story of an atheist family being raped and murdered. Not surprised.
Toasterpops
Those rednecks mostly have university degrees too
Rangizingo
I think he has a masters too, the one who said it.
Snowbocop
I read all of those in his voice... Which means he yelled all of it. I love Bill Burr
herc18
He also mentioned that it was not his place to judge. I think his belief is terrible but he's going about it correctly.
SAWhowhatnow
Except that he did nothing BUT judge. It's like saying "no offense" and then insulting someone, it doesn't work like that.
Nown
Exactly, it's like saying "I'm not racist, but if black people picked cotton every day they wouldn't be in the mess they are now" 1/2
Nown
(Which is also paraphrased from something he actually said) 2/2
SugarSmack
TravNel
I love how racism and sexism are bad except when applied to white males. America is a great little piece of shit.
ExploratoryDentalSurgery
Why are people no longer allowed to have differing opinions?
ExploratoryDentalSurgery
People who express different opinions are themselves considered defective- not valued simply as someone with a different opinion.
dudeplayingthedudedisguisedasanotherdude
I absolutely understand where you're coming from, but should someone's right to marry who they love and be happy be an opinion?
SAWhowhatnow
Who said they aren't? You can have all the differing opinions you want; and we can tell you why we disagree with them.
T1cklish
It's perfectly fine to have different opinions. To not expect to have to deal with criticism is the problem.
ExploratoryDentalSurgery
People who express different opinions are themselves considered defective- not valued simply as someone with a different opinion.
Jerthanel92
One thing though.. The duck dynasty guys were all clean-shaven, country club folks before their tv show.
TanstaaflTovarisch
There was one picture like that. The senior Robertson was, is, and will always be a redneck. Listen to some Terry Bradshaw college stories.
Sozu
It seems like his view on rednecks is just as stereotypical as the other guy's view on gays that he described.
OrionthecatAttack
Then change the views? If no one wants to be stereotyped, then change.
Homophone
As someone frame the Appalachians, it is actually pretty typical. It's not the rule, but it's extremely common.
SAWhowhatnow
Won't someone PLEASE think of the poor white people for once?!
Shittbutt
But what he described is what that man does
GilderoyPopDropNLockart
From someone brought up in a rural area it's pretty accurate
Sozu
The smaller the sample size, the more it will stand out. My point in my original comment was to bring attention to his hypocrisy.
IAlwaysDownVoteMe
It doesn't matter how many progressive rednecks there are; the fact is if you had to bet on it, where are you gonna put your money?
viperfolk
Until the progressive rednecks are a majority. Then you kinda wanna bet on the progressive ones.
TomxHasxTourettes
I think it's generally true that rural areas tend towards conservative values, and cities tend towards liberal values.
psychoscitzo1
I concur Fuck those stupid California liberals ducking shit up
DrYoloMcSwagmasterIIIEsq
Most stereotypes are at least somewhat based in truth
helagos
Except that the sterotype fits. I lived in a city up until I was around 9yrs old and went to an inner city school that was a mix of all (1)
Sighchologist
Don't know why you got downvoted to hell there pal but I hear you and have had similar experiences. Imgur is weird sometimes.
helagos
Indeed it is. It looks like I've been upvoted back to positive. People are just upset that the stereotype is true most of the time.
helagos
different races. Never once thought there was anything odd about that. Then we moved south and suddenly it's nothing but white people (2)
TheLastSouthernGentleman
I live in the rural south (obviously) and my school was about 20% black and 20% hispanic. Plenty of diversity in southern states
helagos
Rural south as well here and there was one black family who moved less than 6 months after moving into the area. Just depends where you are.
TheLastSouthernGentleman
I don't deny that. I knew of two all white schools that I played ball against but thats because it was farm country,not because of racism 1.
TheLastSouthernGentleman
2. sure racism exists but typically not to the level that people think when they think of the south. Just my experience and location I guess
helagos
and only one black family in the entire K to 12 school. And that's when I learned what racism was. And they were also huge homophobes. (3)
almostsomething182
I went to a small school in Texas where there was literally like 3 black people in the school. There was NO racism or homophobes.
helagos
Then you got lucky. I'm glad you didn't have to grow up with that. And I wasn't saying all rednecks are, but a majority of them are.
SouthernFriedGeorgian
I live in the south but white people are the minority here.
helagos
And when I was living in the city, my family was the only white one on the block.
keenidiot
Honestly not sure if he believes it, but a lot of his audience does.
MeLlamoGroot
See? Profiling is just fine when it's done to rednecks!
senshu
Despite being an agnostic, I can still grasp the concept of "love the sinner, hate the sin." I wonder why liberals cannot.
ilikegummylifesavers
Because it's fucking stupid to consider it a sin to begin with.
TanstaaflTovarisch
lol, he wasn't talking about homosexuality.
ilikegummylifesavers
Pretty sure that in this context he was.
Thispostisaboutacat
♫ Say what we say when we say it ♫
HelloOutThere
Say it again and you can go home to your toys
nascarguy
Amen
VonJello
Alright I'll say it. I'll say it again. Now can I go home to my toys?
ComaCola
*applause*
TKandMit
Alright I'll say it, I'll say it again. Now can I go home to my toys?
AssassinsWeed
Alright, I'll say it. I'll say it again.
caladhielguar
His name sounds like goosebumps girl saying Bilbo
TanstaaflTovarisch
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6BNHwomivfQ
joe164
Holy shit I clicked on that link, then clicked on the "related video" which was the rest of that standup show, and now it's 2am. Worth it.
YouMightGetIdeas
Just watched the whole show (also available in youtube) and it's fuckin awesome.
Antfarmz
"They [the church] just fucking brainwash you, you know?" *cheering* "No, don't clap, don't clap! I don't read. Follow someone else."
TorSverre
varmints
Mewmus
seriously, is it REALLY so shocking that a conservative Christian was against gay marriage?
SAWhowhatnow
Just because it was expected doesn't mean we shouldn't criticize it.
Mewmus
do you feel the need to criticize him because his beliefs are different than yours?
SAWhowhatnow
Do you often criticize people for having the SAME beliefs as you? Do you even know what criticism is?
Mewmus
you seem to have utter contempt for any opinions that are different than yours, by definition, that makes you a bigot. look it up
SAWhowhatnow
If this were true you'd be correct. But I only hold contempt for ignorance, not simply differing opinions. So that argument don't fly, son.
ilikegummylifesavers
No, because his views are 1) wrong, and 2) actively harmful to other people.
Mewmus
in your opinion his views are wrong. and exactly who did he harm with him saying "it just doesent make any sense to me" ?
ilikegummylifesavers
Because he is promoting the idea that gay people are immoral and deviant, which contributes to public animus against them. People are more 1
ilikegummylifesavers
2 likely to feel justified in their mistreatment of gay people if they feel society supports them.
youlovemeyouhateme
When this "news" came out, my first thought was the reporter should be fired. What's next - - do fat kids like cake? Exclusive at 11.
smaug777000
"LA Clippers guy, he didn't say the N-word once!"
CharlesFuckingBronson
He also discriminated in his rental properties and was generally a piece of shit businessman.
Ingonyama
"What about Facebook?" "I DON'T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT FACEBOOK.... Just keep it off Instagram."
Thekindofkindlyman
He got run out of LA for saying something in private. How many people here have nothing to hide if their private conversation became public
IceCubesInMyTea
*raises hand*
KosherToaster
You're not very good at this
BimmerBoost
My god. Logic exists on the internet still.
AIRBORNEALLTHEWAY
You're just gonna find my dick pics and a ton of dumb shit about stuff we could do, but probably shouldn't if we want to live.
gamblingpoet
He should have been run out of LA years ago for discriminatory practices involving minority tenants at his apartment buildings.
rollercostarican
if your boss found out you told your coworker "in private" that she was a Cunt, scaving Bitch" do you think you would keep your job?
BimmerBoost
Considering I'm self employed and male, I'd give myself a raise.
jimicos
He also hired more black coaches than any owner in NBA history.
IceCubesInMyTea
as slave drivers
nflgeneric
Just cause someone hires a black person doesn't mean they get to claim they aren't racist. "I have black friends", etc.
RoomTemperatureCoffee
But if you are objectively helping members of a race, being internally racist isn't really a problem. That's just thoughtcrime.
InboxMeYourGermanShepherds
And when thoughtcrime becomes a punishable offense, we're all fucked
rollercostarican
yeah and slave owners also paid for slaves lol
MrMayberry
So paying a man millions of dollars to coach other black men you pay millions of dollars, is now the same as owning slaves? I had no idea
rollercostarican
you don't think there are any sexist bosses with women employees? Or any racist doesn't hire an immigrant for cheaper labor?
rollercostarican
im not saying its the same as owning slaves, im saying paying people of another ethnicity doesn't mean you dont have racist views
rollercostarican
i was simply saying the exchange of currency for labor, isnt the be all end all for evaluating discriminative behavior, especially when...
jimicos
"Yes, yes it is." - Adrian Peterson
rollercostarican
there's a past history and civil lawsuits against you in your other businesses.
MrMayberry
I don't think he wasn't racist, but I also don't think he IS racist for what he did. He fucked up, and paid a HUGE price for it.
MrMayberry
All in all, I agree mostly with what you've said. I just think the slave comparison was a little much.
nflgeneric
"It bothers me a lot that you want to broadcast that you're associating with black people" is an extremely racist statement, though.
FellBells
It doesn't help that the majority of players in the NBA are AfricN-American
smaug777000
The dude is 90, it's still racist, but I sort of assume all 90 year olds are a little racist.
nflgeneric
That doesn't make it right by any means.
smaug777000
no, not at all, but Burr's point is that it doesn't make it shocking
RoomTemperatureCoffee
Expressing an opinion that most of society feels is "not right" is also not a legitimate cause for things to be taken from someone.
cameldrinker
"Black people are cool" is also technically a racist statement.
RoomTemperatureCoffee
More racist. It implies a difference between races. The initial quote referred to actions related to race, not to qualities of that race.
Lemesplain
Yeah, but for an 80 year old white dude, it was pretty mellow racism. Dude was born in the 30s. His grandparents might've owned slaves.
ColonelOfTruth
That's not what he said though, albeit close. What he said was essentially: "Look, I'm a billionaire; I associate with a certain type of
ColonelOfTruth
2 person, and that type of person is not ok with black people, like the ones you've been publicly displaying and associating with me." It's
ColonelOfTruth
3 not a nice thing to say, but I don't really think *he* was the racist in the situation, really.
ColonelOfTruth
I had an awesome video, I actually think by Stephen A. Smith (but admittedly I can't remember) that perfectly responded to this. Trying...
RoomTemperatureCoffee
I think he made racist demands (i.e. demands based on race) but you're right that it was mainly a function of his environment.
ColonelOfTruth
Found it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g6bLKe9-Mto
InboxMeYourGermanShepherds
Still though, haven't you ever said something as controversial as that in a private conversation?
nflgeneric
Sure, but would you want to work for someone if you heard them say awful things about your race / orientation in private?
RoomTemperatureCoffee
But this guy didn't say awful things about a race. He indicated personal prejudice without being particularly critical of the race itself. 1
RoomTemperatureCoffee
If anything, he said awful things about himself, but not really. Basically: "My prejudices cause me to perceive black people badly in some 2
RoomTemperatureCoffee
situations." That's actually a pretty normal way for laypeople to feel. He just vocalized it. That's not really malicious on his part. 3
InboxMeYourGermanShepherds
If it didn't affect my job, or the professional relationship between me and them, I couldn't care less.
LAvaughn
Umm idk bout that. if u had a choice.. If my boss was hitler or a serial rapist, and I was jewish/a girl. Out of principal and self respect
ColonelOfTruth
Right. Someone can't help how they feel, but they *can* help how they act. And in the end, feelings mean nothing and only actions matter.
FlatusIgnition
Redneck he may be, but that fucker is rich as hell.
whoisyourdaddy
He's allowed to have those thoughts. He didn't bash anyone, he just said that he doesn't understand why they would prefer anus to a vagina.
whoisyourdaddy
They are not out there with nooses and shit. He's just shaking his head 'cause he thinks he's better than them.
whoisyourdaddy
And who doesn't think they are better than someone else? I can kick that guys ass in a skateboard contest. Doesn't mean I am oppressive.
Legendoom
Nobody is saying he isn't allowed to have them. He is. And we're allowed to call him a fuckin' asshole.
SAWhowhatnow
No one is trying to mind control his thoughts, but if he's allowed to have them then we're allowed to criticize them.
CthulhuCups
Get out of here with your logic and rational thinking!
whoisyourdaddy
1) Not the media; they are supposed to be objective. 2) He was pretty much fired for exercising freedom of speech. Not cool.
SAWhowhatnow
1) Says who? 2) Freedom of speech on protects you from government censorship and nothing else. Actions have consequences, deal with it.
TanstaaflTovarisch
And yes, I know it doesn't say the if unbiased thing, but that's implied heavily. At the time biased reporting wasn't considered news at all
FancyGiraffes
On consequences: Is this reaction reasonable though? Do we need to get everyone fired who disagrees with us respectfully?
FancyGiraffes
Obviously heavily dissuades the opinion, but it also creates large scale resentment and even hate. Aren't there better ways to handle this?
TanstaaflTovarisch
In regards to the media, you need to do some reading. Media was given freedom to do their thing in the constitution IF unbiased.
SAWhowhatnow
And it also doesn't address the fact that his freedom of speech wasn't being infringed upon like you implied.
SAWhowhatnow
Sorry, but that simply isn't something that's supported by case law.
whoisyourdaddy
And he thinks god doesn't like it either. It's OK for him to think that way. They still sell duck calls and camo to gay guys.
Iamsonewatthis
The helicopter bit during this set had me falling out of my chair in a library. I didn't even care that I was disturbing 20 other people.
Legendariel
You should be more considerate when you're in a library.
OrionthecatAttack
"Sir, put your seatbelt back on"
bigez1988
I saw him do that bit live, my face hur y from laughing so much
Iamsonewatthis
When he starts screaming "FUUUUUUCK FUUUUUUCK!" I think I was drooling on myself. Fucking golden.
crotalus123
You should watch Tom Segura's new special next
Lexsteel11
"YOU'RE fat as shit- YOU know when shit tastes good- HOOK that shit up."
Iamsonewatthis
I watched the one on Netflix and saw him live last month and met him after the show, awesome guy. Is there a new one?
crotalus123
His newest is Completely Normal, its on Netflix, so its probably the one you saw
sadwastedmexican
no never watch his standup in a public place!!
Robvp
Isn't the Varmin' Shootin' Redneck with a beard down to his dick an image for the show? They look like your average white person
Robvp
http://cdn.inquisitr.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/06/Duck-Dynasty-Fake-Playing-Golf.jpg
TanstaaflTovarisch
Being clean shaven does not make you not a redneck. I should know. I'm a varmint shooting, clean shaven, software developer.
whoisyourdaddy
Serious Question: Why the fuck does anyone need a government license to get married?
TanstaaflTovarisch
Taxes. It's not like you apply and can be turned down for it. It's basically just a tax form.
SAWhowhatnow
Taxes, retirement inheritance, power of attorney, hospital visitation, estate transfers, adoption, and a LOT more. But you don't NEED [1]
otherbill
Taxes.
itsybitsyspider
And if they separate to file proper paperwork for property division and if applicable, custody issues
Babytears
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/04/15/roger-gorley-gay-man-denied-hospital-visitation-legal-defense_n_3086977.html? This sort of thing.
SAWhowhatnow
a government license to have a marriage ceremony, just to have the marriage recognized. [2]
lifeofabaddog
Granted, I do know many varmint-shootin', beard-havin', swamp-dwelling rednecks with progressive views on gay marriage.
thatguyyouthinkyouknow7
That's good. All the rednecks I know over the age of about 24 are conservative dicks about everything. Some of the young ones are okay tho.
kyrtian
*raises hand* Hey there
jadespider
just to clarify, exactly how many varmint-shootin, beard-havin', swamp-dwelling rednecks do you know with conservative views on gay marriage
MeridaIsMySpiritAnimal
All of them I can think of over 30 who I'm related to/know (at least a dozen or so) I don't associate much with that side of the family....
VodkaReindeer
Do you live in the swamps of Austin?
lifeofabaddog
No I live in the mountains in north Georgia, but I frequent the swamps down south.
Carnwennan
Like my Fallout characters!
Bent0916
Just about all of em I know are progressive. Not racist either. The hipsters living in the city are the racists in my social circle.
fraxinusoleaceae
For real though. Each time I meet some 'post-racial-irony' white kid my 10-guage finger gets itchy.
strongfkennedy
That's that 10%
CharmingAndSexyGentlemanStarshipCaptain
Do you hear banjo playing in the distance?
varsil
Yeah. I'm a left-leaning Libertari-ish gun owner, and there's a lot of others like me. And a lot of "rednecks" who's take is "who cares?"
KernDergsCornDog
Most redneck I know, living in east Texas, don't give a shit about being gay.
GilderoyPopDropNLockart
All the red necks I know are all pretty homophobic and racist
BetterLuckyThanGood
At the risk of further stereotyping, I would say that you have to add 'Christian' for this to be correct.
eetsumkaus
I'm gonna go ahead and guess you live in Oregon or Washington
lifeofabaddog
Nope, north Georgia. Beginning of the AT
fraxinusoleaceae
Varmint-shootin', queer-lovin, welfare supporting, lefty southerner here, checking in. I wish people wouldn't hand out stereotype-passes.
MrRandom314159
BUT it makes things so much EASIER.
Lemesplain
But are you 80? Cuz age is an important factor here.
BukkakeAntiAgingCream
But do you havd beard down to your dick, sitting on a boat, in a swamp?
fraxinusoleaceae
To be fair, no. My beard and my dick, long as either may be, are destined never to meet. I've got a swamp boat. It's a ways away though.
moonrhino68
i want to see these replies, but can't. noooooo.
hiimmat
Most of those I know in their 20s and 30s are leaning more toward the Libertarian side of "just leave people alone".
Repostradamus
As a late 20s varmint-shootin', country-dwelling, wish-the-military-would-allow-beards-havin' redneck, yeah, sounds about right.
InboxMeYourGermanShepherds
As a 27 year old. Can confirm.
StopReadingThisUsername
Hell, I'm NOT a varmint-shootin', beard-havin', swamp-dwelling redneck and I still think "just leave people alone" sounds like a great idea.
EpicPancakes
Ron Swanson.
fasdaffas
Too bad you can't get away with that around socialists.
tonto5150
glad to see that from someone else, ive been noticing this over my short 27 years of earthtime as well
Coreadrin
As it should be.
BeeeardedMan
As a 35 year old bearded Libertarian..you're spot on.
Cpink123
There are dozens of us!
Some0neSetUpUsTheBomb
Dozens!
FlamedLion
Damn straight.
trev17175
That's me in a nutshell. As long as you don't infringe on anyone else's rights, do what you please, and allow me the same.
IsDisassembled
Then there's the issue of people's rights overlapping - case of Indiana and legal vs religious rights. I'm just thankful I live in Canada.
tomyironmane
That seemed more or less the Duck Dynasty guy's opinion wen I read it. "I don't understand it, it don't make sense to me."
tomyironmane
As I recall, he had similar things to say about jerks who are ruining straight marriage....
Coreadrin
Yes.
TheLurkIsReal
Thank you. It's the fact that Phil is a Christian, not a redneck, that he said that stuff.
GrabbinSince05
I'm gonna talk about OBAMA, and that he's fuckin gay! He's fuckin gay as hell!
SlickDevil
Double standards pissed me off. Religious person speaks against Gay? *boos*. Gays speak against religious folks? *cheers*
ElGuitaristMagnifico
One is a criticism of choice, and the other a criticism of what a person is/can't change. That's why.
8PiLoT0
So bullying is right as long as its to religious folk but they can't fight back?
ElGuitaristMagnifico
Akin to speaking out against being black (unchangeable being) vs. speaking out against being a member of a political party (choice). (3/3)
ilikegummylifesavers
If I say your church is corrupt and swindles people out of money, that's not the same as telling me I'm evil for the way I was born.
ElGuitaristMagnifico
Speaking against being gay is bullying, because it is not a choice. Against religion is not bullying, because it is a choice. (2)
PoppaBeenSmoothSinceTheDaysOfUnderoos
I'm against all marriage. No one should get married...to anyone. Trust me on this one.
ninmonkey
Dang. And I was going to marry that turtle too. I guess it was a bad idea. [s]he'd outlive me forever.
PoppaBeenSmoothSinceTheDaysOfUnderoos
that might actually just be dumb enough to work
ninmonkey
They always said I was a few banana's short of a bushel.