HitlersFather
210126
15060
410
*(Don't READ this card out loud, just look shocked and gag).
Thanks to @DrCheesyCheese for pointing it out
Part 2: http://imgur.com/gallery/rUkC8
Part 3: http://imgur.com/gallery/ruLve
Part 4: http://imgur.com/gallery/1fXFJ
TheStylishIrish
The oscar pistorius one tho
butImNotBasicRx
Imgur needs to do one huge game of cards against humanity
BadBunnyXoXo
+1 for banana for scale
smiles669
This game is great because my best buddy is gay. Pray the gay away is the best card I can get my hands on
usernametakenisthestoryofmylife
The ginger one...
StatelyRavenOfTheSaintlyDaysOfYore
Hehe the dyslexic kkk one just reminds me of Prejudice by Tim Minchin.
smurfalurfalurfalurf
How's about "overdosing on gummy vitamins" ?
skiimoksius
But what if I the card out loud? Huh!? Whatcha gonna do?
Kevinized100
"Sandy hook, the video game."
ForsakenEostre
I have so many blank white cards that won't be blank much longer, thank you. xD
Jerrin
Incase you didn't know @op you can go to the card casr website and make custom decks and either print them out, or use them with the 1/2
AlefgardHero
I just went through and added all of these to a CardCast deck now. Code: DEC7S
TheLarrikin
+1 for Card Cast. Imported CAH deck and removed ones the shock factor wore off. Entered hundreds of custom cards. YE4BK
Jerrin
Cards against humanity online game at pretend your xyzzy 2/2
HitlersFather
I didn't know that, thank you!
Catanimal17
Getting away with murder by claiming it was simply a, "post birth abortion"
Halfasandwich
911, the musical
LearnedCoward
*finger snaps* when you're a jet...
SuckMyFace
ON ICE
DoctorWatchamacallit
"i'll call the police or an AAMMMBULANCE"....or did you mean 9/11?
jonhnefill
Sang this in William Shatner's voice in my head.
SuckMyFace
I think Porsche 911... could be wrong...
BreadyStinellis
I can't remember what it was but I just watched some show where they did do a musical about 9/11. It was a British show? Maybe Australian? T
BreadyStinellis
The drama teacher kept calling Americans "his people" because his dad was an imigrant from the US.
thejpn
Then came the day Osama blew it away...
wholewheatbagel
Skins?
BreadyStinellis
Oh, yeah. I guess so. I reached the first 2 seasons a month or 2 ago.
robotulism
My 12 yr old cousin made one, "shoving a toothpick under your big toenail and kicking a wall." Kid's twisted.
LearnedCoward
Motherfucker did I cringe at that one
imgurandchill
That first one though I could see some antivaxer foaming at the mouth from.
bratford
Amazing
zacharydonj
A White Supremacist that ONLY eats the brown M&Ms
DrCheesyCheese
(Don't this card out loud)
PeopleDoNotThink
I accidentally the whole card.
causticcoquette
Oh I think I will this card out loud
WhoPaidForThisFloor
Fuck I already
NICEUSEOFWORDSSIR
Don't dead. Open inside.
FuoccoBlue
That would be a great card.
buzkashix
"Right swiping your mom on Tinder" was a good write-in on ours
Volcaetis
My favorite that I've made:
JakeOnFire
Hello. It's me.
IridescentLotus
Don't they all?! Why am I paying all this money for it, otherwise?!
USSRsub
Saving this for... later
thefuzziestofbutts
GoCorral
So just a normal Canadian penis then.
12amsey
My buddy's fave was "being a window washer for the twin towers on 9/11"
Volcaetis
Oh that is positively brutal! I love it! Although I'd probably just write "Being a window washer for the twin towers," to make it subtler.
PBRyan
You have very nice handwriting!
Volcaetis
Really? Thanks! I always think it looks like chicken-scratch. Especially when I'm writing quickly.
PleaseSendMeNews
Pm for me for the syrup sex
lightswitchrave
My waffles are ready ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
bronto44
Are they blue?
SithariChaos
Of course they are
emergencyhuman
NGL, I'll consider that a feature.
Volcaetis
Tell me about it!
AlLocke4
So, every Canadian penis?
RollinRockabilly
I'm stealing this one for sure lol
IsDisassembled
Weird, mine never did that...
ecodude
Try harder
Volcaetis
Looks like you got the short end of the di... I mean, stick.
kungfucatattack
Hmmm. I didn't think any of these were that great.
ObamasBigBlackCaucus
Yeah I don't see how this made top post.
applesforjuice
"banana for scale" <-- not funny pretty much ever
jaroferic
You would say that, being an Apple evangelist.
notdiavolo
*best Elmer fudd voice* and here the planes come, and here the planes come!
HitlerWasASensitiveGuy
+1 for username
JamesVodka
+1 for your username
Conmars
If you say so, mister SS guard.
lestcore
Anal cunt
squidjism
HoliBug
Did you actually type out that link?
squidjism
Right before I killed myself.
ErikMm
why is yours a .webp when the original is a .png?
squidjism
Because I plagiarized it and tried to pass it off as my own before I killed myself.
Ahlyss24
Looking at you Courtney Love.
Simgeek
Where can I order the Imgur expansion pack?
Kaabiiisabeast
The kkk one killed the shit out of me haha
butthesuniseclipsedbythemoon
I have the dubious pleasure of play CAH with people who don't have English as a first language. The humour gets lost....
LearnedCoward
That's me when I play the Argentinian version. I have no clue who half of the cards are referring to
weirdcalculator
"I know what bukkake is, but what is pixelated?"
IsDisassembled
Dubious indeed.
IridescentLotus
I'd love to see you try to explain the smegma card to them
butthesuniseclipsedbythemoon
It's very difficult! I have an Angolan, Mauritians, and a Sicilian to explain to, I'm pissing myself laughing and getting blank looks!
IridescentLotus
"Never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line!"
butthesuniseclipsedbythemoon
Don't I know it! ????
Dugalug
I think that group would understand smegma pretty well...
BreadyStinellis
Haha!
ThatGuyYouMetOnTheBus
"Nine consecutive wet dreams about each Supreme Court Justice."
FilthyRedmond
Justice Thomas ;)
DoctorWatchamacallit
*eight
ratfaceddog
81 wet dreams?
XaiaX
It'd be 72 right now.
ratfaceddog
I almost changed it to 72, when I caught what I'd done, then decided Scalia should be included, after all. If you're gonna get weird...
ratfaceddog
There's nothing wrong with having a wet dream about Scalia. J/K, there's totally something wrong with that. Not much more than the rest, tho
XaiaX
I don't know who down voted this but they're wrong.
realmdweller
#7 Joke is on them! They're all brown on the inside! Muahaha
tjelliott21
Aren't we all, my brotha?
celestedrake
Not all... http://www.peppermintmms.com/mms-peppermint-9oz.jpg http://cr">-9oz.jpg">http://www.peppermintmms.com/mms-peppermint-9oz.jpg http://cre8tivecompass.com/mag/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/MMs-CandyCorn.png
UserNameUnavailable
lol nice
Slotherin
you're fun at parties aren't you?
celestedrake
Nope. I am generally an anti-party person. Unless it is a D&D-type party. Then yes.
Slotherin
mind you, the peanut butters ones are an orange colour lol
KirschPunkt
White chocolate and peppermint? I only knew peppermint M&M's in black chocolate until now.
celestedrake
Malikhi
It's cuz they're full of shit! Wait, what? Hold on...... Oh you meant the m&ms... Right, ha ha...
SpaceballsTheComment
TIL we're all and equally full of shit. Psych! I already learned that decades ago!
eetsumkaus
not me. I just got done wiping.
SuspiciousCharacter
Germankipp
I enjoyed it.
batosai33
And about 5.999999 million others
PleaseSendMeNews
Funny but terrible, but still funny
Ifichaseitimgonnafuckit
I laughed uncomfortably hard as well.
WarJesus420
6,000,001 dead.
ThatOneGuyWhoPostsThingsInfrequently
I'll have to remember that one next time my Jewish friend posts on /r/roastme
masterEx
Not just you..
JerryGunter
I like you
ICanKickflip
Jimmy Carr, great dark humour comedian
agileprune
Also part of the best dark humour bit in history IMO
AllTheseFlavorsAndYouChooseToBeSalty
Link daaaat
agileprune
:* https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jMJ-JblBln8
TheFirstCurse
I READ THIS ALOUD AT WORK, EVERYONE'S OFFENDED, I WORK WITH PERSIAN JEWS, SEND HELP!
SuspiciousCharacter
This is a bit late but why not just fart on them and run?
Conmars
No. And for your crimes, I sentence you to death: by BIRD!
alvasalrey
You and 5999999 others
RubyPorto
It killed a lot of "people"
Mjrdrous
Damnit, beat me to it...
Luftewaffle
Them's some suspicious quotes there, pal
senvoler
That's some suspicious username you got there, pal.
TheBlackShakes
That's a suspicious pal you got there, friend
senvoler
That's a suspicious friend you got there, buddy
d3jake
Six million times over?
ImTotallyNotBob
EVERYONE, Acknowledge the OP's name.
Conmars
You Jewish?
braaaiiiiinnnnsss
Who's asking?
Conmars
Your mother. She's worried about you.
FormalShorts
Not anymore.
gestun
I used to be full Jew, but now I am just Jewish.
BarnibusSwarleyStinson
Jew were a Jew? Ah I did nazi that joke coming
spybone
SomewhereBetweenTheSacredSilenceAndSleep
You never go full jew...
BaltimoresJandro
Imgurisweird
Heh.
MostIndeedlySo
FaptainDeadpool
Sauce?
MostIndeedlySo
Ikebukuro West Gate Park.
zimirken
We laughed a little too hard at this.
Aeroengineering
We?
6Gaurav9
Gollum and smeagle
Leadfoot
Shhhh, that one's crazy.
queenelizabeth
AAAhaahhahah My first thought was "He must be Jewish...", and by golly I'm laughing to hard to be upset that you got to the joke first! >_<
hprotman
Jew-ish
Zombieibmoz
http://media-2.web.britannica.com/eb-media/58/129958-004-C9B8B89D.jpg This one killed them...
borealis
Saw this comment, tried to guess which card killed you. Thought I knew. ...I am unrelatable :(
thefrayedendsofsanity
You and 5,999,999 others.
TheDarkLordOfTrees
Don't talk to me or my six million sons ever again
Theresaholeintheworldthere
No, Hitler killed you
PleaseSendMeNews
Go home KKK
aiwubf
My wife was talking about something serious while I was reading this and started laughing hysterically. She wasn't happy even after I showed
Maniacxxl
I think the problem is you scrolling through imgur while she was talking about something serious. Gotta give the girl focus, breh.
davidbowieeyes
Uhhh, maybe the part where you were reading while she was talking about something serious also set the mood